KJ

... I really don't know what to say :lol: If I took this seriously, then I would take it apart and change around veerything so its reads as a solemn, ...

Hmmm. Honestly, I'm not sure how I feel about it. My first instinct is to say that this is all telling and you need to show us, but it is ...

ADVICE. BETTER APPREICATE THESE LITTLE NUGGEST OF WISDOM!: Okay, first off, I just want you to know that I'm not trying to be mean. But I don't want to lie ...

Since the nitpicks have been covered, I have two words for you: Punctuation and telling. Both need looking at in this piece. Capitalization and commas are always important. Oh, and ...

Hey guys. Hope you like the addition. Oh, I didn't have time to do the Italics, and I'm off to work, so I'll get to them as soon as I ...

Hey. I read the piece above, and I didn't see any nitpicks - just one thing. Or maybe a few. First, you're telling. Majorly. You know what that means, don't ...

Hey girly. I'm glad you decided to post this on YWS. I read the whole thing, and I only found one nitpick that really bothered me. And, really, is it ...

Well, I didn't spot anything wrong with this that Ash didn't catch. But I did want to point out a couple things: Telling and punctuation. The piece mainly consisted of ...

I just wanted to thank you guys. All of you. Your encouragement just really makes the writing worthwhile. And I'll definitely keep going with this. Thanks again, Angel of Death, ...

Chapter Nine The blood on the floor continued to flow down the length of the bus, a small, morbid river. I could feel the eyes of millions watching us, watching ...

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Hello Moonlight. Honestly, I'm not in the mood for nitpicks, but I did read through the piece and there were a few things I wanted to say about it. One, ...

I started this, but, honestly, there were too many punctuation errors and too much awkward wording. It got to me. So I'll just point out a few places where you ...

I owe you for all the reviews you've done for me, and this is also just a small thanks for your time. You're a great friend to have here on ...