KAVOR17

Sorry Jake i have to say that i didn't like the style you wrote in. I thought the idea was great though. There were also alot of puncutation errors. But ...

I think really said about all of it. I really enjoyed this piece and would like to see more of it. It was hard to understand but that might be ...

thx for your insight an suggestions.

I no im just a novice but i have to heavily disagree with the senior writer. I think he did well on this piece. I disagree with the saying ship ...

Good idea i like it but the part where goes into the house and then the basement then back up into the house? whats that about? try to explain that ...

Over all i think you did good but add more descriptions to this and its kind of confusing how you ask the reader so many questions. Try make his kill ...

The boy was only 13 years old, but had made the torturous journey up the mountain. He stood on a sharp cliff at the very top of the icy mountain. ...

Really finish your writing good idea just express it better

Arsla Viner leaned back in her chair staring at the holographic map. So far they had held. Humans had held Earth and the moon so far. But even this said ...

hey my story i edited again so i'd liked to hear your thoughts on it... its the "The World of Dreamers" one

As the owl outside rustled its feathers to rid them of snow, the boy inside the large, quiet house shook violently in his bed. Even though it was a frozen ...

nvm

nvm