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Jetpack

  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: Green with Envy

    Well, I've requested a couple of reviews in the Will Review For Food threads, so hopefully they'll come through soon. My intent was just to use the soldier as a ...

    Jul 13, 2009
  • WRFF Archive Re: Antigone's Critique Shop

    This is a contest entry. It's in Other Fiction, called 'Green with Envy' for the moment, and is kind of hard to explain without killing it completely. Though it's not ...

    Jul 13, 2009
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: For the Once upon a time contest

    This is so sweet. I suppose I can't really say I love the idea if it actually happened, but it's so easy to relate to. The first half is written ...

    Jul 13, 2009
  • Action/Adventure Novels Re: The Choices We Make (Part 1 of 2)

    I'll try and build on what's already been mentioned, but mostly I have just a few minor errors to point out. Home was nowhere to be found. This reads, to ...

    Jul 13, 2009
  • Fantasy Short Stories Re: In the Beginning

    I love the way it's written. It sounds very archaic and like an old fairy tale, which I suppose was the effect you wanted. The whole piece is very cleverly ...

    Jul 13, 2009
  • WRFF Archive Re: The Angel's Gallery [Grand Reopening]

    I've got a piece in need of a critique, if you have a moment. Title: Green with Envy Genre: Other Fiction Link: Thank you! :)

    Jul 12, 2009
  • Romantic Short Stories Re: Brian's Eyes

    So, a critique. Well, to comment on the piece in general, quality of writing aside, this is quite clichéd. The love triangle between the cute guy who happens to be ...

    Jul 11, 2009
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: Green with Envy

    This is an entry for the 'How far can you reach?' contest, which involved picture prompts. Said prompts can be found here ; I used the fourth one. All reviews ...

    Jul 11, 2009
  • Welcome Mat Re: Hey. Hi. Hello.

    Just wanted to thank you all for the welcome - feels like I've been here for ages already. :)

    Jul 11, 2009
  • Science-Fiction Novels Re: The prologue of my yet-to-be-named novel

    Well, firstly, it IS very short, even for a prologue. It's so short, I question whether it's necessary for the following novel - if it is, then you could flesh ...

    Jul 11, 2009
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: Drowning

    It's quite short, so I'll do you a line-by-line since there's no real plot to it. That's not a bad thing, by any means, though. My comments are in bold. ...

    Jul 10, 2009
  • Fantasy Short Stories Re: The (True) Story of Hansel and Gretel : Intro

    I love it, too. It's very original, and telling it from the "villain's" (if indeed the 'witch' is the villain in your tale) perspective will be fun to write as ...

    Jul 9, 2009
  • Fantasy Short Stories Re: Broken Feather, Broken Soul

    I suppose this could be considered atheistic, in a way, but it fits the metaphor that you intended it to have even better. Oddly, I was reminded of Nazi Germany ...

    Jul 8, 2009
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: Dinosaur in the Attic

    This is a short piece, but it doesn't really live up to the term "short story". It's a little bit fragmented; I'm not fond of the dialogue, in particular. Harsh ...

    Jul 8, 2009
  • Fantasy Novels Re: Resistance [Prologue 0.0]

    If you can even write something cohesive in a Word War, and you clearly can, you deserve a medal. :P The product of my most recent Word War was a ...

    Jul 8, 2009


The function of education is to teach one to think intensively and to think critically. Intelligence plus character - that is the goal of true education.
— Martin Luther King, Jr.