Jay

Everything has a niche. Some are bigger than others, and some are much more widely appealing than others. If you are considering writing as a career, you do need to ...

This is a little bit too long to critique all in one chunk. Why don't you break it down and post the first small bit? I'll post a detailed critique ...

First of all, if you do add a romantic interest, don't make him die. Don't make Annie die either! At the moment, Erin has enough trauma-she's just found out her ...

Hi there! I was quite impressed by this-it's unique and mysterious. It's short, suspenseful and gripping. I like how it's not too wordy. I get a mystery/fantasy/adventure vibe from it, ...

Wow. This is gritty, fast-paced and dramatic. I was really impressed-it's compelling without getting too heavy. "Whistfull" should be 'wistful', by the way. I think the first paragraph is unnecessary.

Hi there! Remember, for every piece of work you post, you need to post two critiques-so you need to do two critiques to catch up. This is a suspenseful, moving ...

(This is just a review of the first post) The beginning dialogue between the protagonist and her boyfriend in the beginning just seem so unrealistic for high school kids. Remember, ...

This is very engaging and appealing-teen drama with an intellectual, critical twist. The protagonist is very well-realized-her personality is revealed through the small details, and her candid observa

It's very powerful-short but effective. Is this going to be the start of a longer story, or will you leave it like this? I would like seeing the situation develop, ...

A good beginning. This sort of thing isn't my personal cup of tea. However, from an objective perspective I like your use of detail, and how you use small details ...

You actually made me like something lovey-dovey! And that is not easy. I salute you. It's beautifully written and nearly made me cry. The idea is very unique too. It's ...

Hi! I really enjoyed reading this-it's funny, distinctive and engaging. You have a natural fluency and style with writing. The dialogue at the end should be broken up-start a new ...

First of all, if this is just your rough draft, you need to rework it first. The lines should be arranged into paragraphs, and that would make your writing much ...

The good: Creative, dreamy and poetically written. You have a gift with words and I'm really interested to see the direction you take this in. I'm pleased to say that ...

The basic premise: Chuck is a young god sent to Earth to do a research mission. If he succeeds in this mission, he will be granted the powers of an ...