JaneThermopolis

It sat on my hand, the beautiful creature, its wings in a flutter, with all of its features. The orange surrounding a coat of dark black, with white speckles going ...

Interesting story..I did not see the part where she tells Pace she "has 6 kids" coming..however, I think this story is a bit predictable. By the title, you can tell ...

The poem is ok, but I think there are a couple of things you might need to work on. I liked the first two paragraphs, but this one, I think, ...

The inspiration for this story actually came from a fire I was sitting by yesterday night. As I was watching it flicker, I suddenly got the urge to write, and ...

I really like this story. I like the crook's interesting personality, and you also left me wondering why he killed Emilie and what he did with her diary. This descriptions ...

I really loved this. I don't think this needs to be critiqued much. :)

Nice poem! It was pretty good, but there were some places where commas weren't needed. I also didn't like the part where you repeated "drift", even though it was separated ...

Does anyone watch Glee??? Gosh I really love this show. I was on my facebook a couple of days ago and heard that one of their new songs for the ...

I was about to go to sleep a couple nights ago...when I started to write this in my journal. It's short, (because obviously it's a haiku) but I think it's ...

Thanks for reviewing!! And yes I'll pm you when I finish writing Part 3!

I really liked this haiku. Haikus are meant to be simple, but strike a chord with a reader, and you struck the chord with me. This will also definitely strike ...

Thanks for the comments on Chapter 1. I just posted Chapter 2 and it would be so nice if you two could also read that. Thanks again!

I agree with the two previous posts, you might need to change a couple of the lines in the poem so it makes more sense, but this was a very ...

Like Esther said, this story really has potential. However....I believe that you have the right roots in place. It sort of seemed like you developed an outline with all of ...

Is rated 12 and up because of references to murder and death. *Contain's excerpts from Edgar Allan Poe's "The Raven". CHAPTER 2 by Jane Thermopolis As quickly as Mr. Colliver ...