Incandescence

Dear Chantel: Don't get offended. Don't compain. Re: "Wow. So much negative feedback. I can't help feeling that these comments are a personal attack on me. I don't get offended ...

Dream Deep-- Break your integral up. For instance, that first term after integration pretty obviously becomes x^3, which evaluated from 1 to 0 is going to be (1)^3-(0)^3=1. The other ...

Elizabeth, The freaking injustice of love is plain to any sentient being. The problem with this poem is that it beats the reader over the head with it. There's no ...

write me, I looked here for something new. I could have saved my time. Given the title and the trope, there is nothing here that surprises or delights the reader. ...

carelessaussie13, Is this a poem or a dialogue, and what did you think would be of interest to a reader? I see nothing here worth taking the time to revise. ...

Wiggy-- (A return to this...) Did you consider this without the last strophe? In my first analysis, I felt like the third stanza was the problem; now I think cutting ...

Sara, You have some interesting material here, but to my ear S1 and the last half of S3 should be in a different poem. They seem to fall squarely into ...

Cal-- I remember reading this and thinking, "A testimony to confusion by more confusion!" I love it! Of course, I'm biased, and yes, I am flattered easily. Clear solution: send ...

Hi mer, The main culprit here is the language. You're taking an anthropomorphic approach to the Church - the observations, motivations, and the god-awful conclusion are all too cavalier - ...

Chantel-- This is about as poor as anything I've seen posted here. Physically: It begins with absent meter and quickly abandons that. Punctuation is erratic throughout. The language overall is ...

All-- Many, many articles have been written on the way you should critique a work. I am not going to do that here. Instead, I am going to give you ...

theluckyflower-- This reminds me of a little, oft-repeated love tale that is usually better presented as a County and Western song. Neither the situation, the phrasing or the characters offers ...

LiNdSeY07-- Please tell me this was a joke. It could hardly pass off as poetry (more like terrible prose with even worse linebreaks). Don't be duped: just because people can ...

trident-- I appreciate the effort you took to read and respond. My first thought is that if you haven't already read the rest of this story, it probably coagulates in ...

Sam-- My style for dialogue (of which I am aware you are no fan) is to not address most every phrase to any character--why? It certainly makes the action move ...