Incandescence

[Well, "since when" is a good question; there's heavy debate regarding this holiday amongst prominent YWS Historians, with no collective being any predominant view. Thus, for the sake of diplomacy ...

abbie20, Strictly speaking, "that" is reserved for objects, while "who" is used for people. Thus your title should be "Is a poem to my sister who passed away." As for ...

kinzygirl223, The first ten lines are a list of things such-and-such did, and reads roughly as poetic as a shopping list. The other four lines are so contrived the only ...

sezPez, Two-word lines don't confer an edgy, poetic feel to your poem. They seem sporadic, machine-gun, and are absolutely annoying. For instance, what on earth does the following line break ...

pumpkin_pie101, No. If you're worried about being alone, this certainly isn't going to make anybody care. Making blanket statements about how much your life sucks and how you hate your ...

carolinawashere, What the others have suggested--about it not being connected--is the least of your concerns. The first thing you should be worried about is your sense of geography: the sun ...

Nightfall-- The distinction Snoink suggested between poetry for itself and poetry for fiction is crucial here. As a poem for itself, this is nothing new or exciting--in fact, it bears ...

moon14, This is truly dreadful. Poetry has a vast arsenal of techniques within reach, and yet your attempt only exhibits the ability to hit the enter key (and the ever-promising ...

SASSYLADY333, This is amateur poetry at its worst and shot through with spelling and grammar mistakes--could you at least make a pretense as to your commitment to the craft? Execrable ...

irishnavygirl, This is not what I would call poetry. It's a collection of sentences about to bust at the seams from all the prepositional clauses that ultimately go nowhere. Lines ...

EmoGurl, First, the poem--if you truly thought art was all about you with no consideration for your audience, why on earth did you feel the need to share this? Art ...

Removed.

A small thing to note about Cade's comment, which I mostly agree with--to be a literary agent (or considered a serious one, at any rate) you must often go to ...

University of Houston boasts a pretty strong writing program. In all honesty, though, where you go to college doesn't affect how good a writer you are. You won't learn it ...

Matt, Consider as a starting point for future versions: Standing on a ledge, and below, photographers and reporters flash, and oh, the wind - I just want some fresh air. ...