Incandescence

Blue Fairy, What you can do is toss this in the nearest trash can. There is nothing worth salvaging. What you do have here is fundamentally cliché. You start with ...

revolver-x, Yes, it's horrible. It's horrible in both concept and execution. The idea of describing "lust" by using Webster's Dictionary is so convincing as a serious poetic attempt it almost ...

elephantwalrus, Ignoring the at times stilted rhyme scheme and moderately clichéd concept, you seem to have transcended a host of other new poets here and employed the use of an ...

oneeyedunicornhunter, Judging from the revision, I'd be frightened to see what you had before. The truth is you can't write poetry in ten minutes, and this is an excellent example ...

OblivionShadow, This is hopeless doggerel. Is there an ounce of poetry employed in this piece? You hit an 'Enter' key, but aside from that, I'm left to wonder what you ...

Felicity_92, I admire your ambition in trying poetry, which is a pretty difficult form. In its execution this is at least okay, without too many metric disturbances, but beyond that--I ...

From "And she can't recall her name..." to the end of S1 is largely repetitive, unnecessary detail. I think you could cut it and have a fine poem, though I ...

#9: The trouble with loss is... 1. I place gyroscopes within the first order of wonders: small worlds which coalesce, bend and break with the lean and sway of tipping ...

re: #7-- Poets try for perfect rhyme and get it right from time to time. Often though, it seems they can't and settle for imperfect slant. The reader then must ...

I'll probably add some other NaPos to this, eventually... #3: To the park I once called home... I had stood here some years before, when the grass (and the wind) ...

Removed.

HelpSOS, This is gimmicky garbage. Throw it away now and actually try writing poetry that doesn't require tricks to sustain itself. Best, Brad

Removed.

Should white people celebrate MLK Day? Yes, if they want, they should. Why should what you believe keep you from celebrating the (albeit adopted) cultural traditions of other people?

Updated: 25 March 2008 Sent off three queries on my second novel, "All the Places You Forget." Rejections, rejections... Let you all know how it turns out. Cheers, Brad