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Re: On Rowboats and Trees
I liked the title, very inventive and creative, and your punctuation was acceptable, better than many on YWS, and the poem was good, I liked the imagery and vivid pictures ...
Jun 7, 2011 -
Re: What you don't see
I actually loved it, your vocabulary was awesome, you had punctuation and you had a good central idea. the one critique I DO have, is that the first letter of ...
Jun 7, 2011 -
Re: Presents for YWS (Summer Music Mixes)
Latin
Jun 7, 2011 -
Re: a little dream in abstract
Not a bad poem, just some parts didn't really fit together, its like you were squeezing the wrong pieces together in a puzzle. For instance: red on black blue on ...
Jun 7, 2011 -
Re: La Luna y el DelfĂn (The Moon and the Dolphin)
Well, well, well, it seems you were quite talented when you were 12, assuming you've gotten better since then, you've gotta be a hell of a poet now. I read ...
Jun 7, 2011 -
Re: Private Moment
I can agree with you that it needs some editing as it is a bit raw, but it wasn't as bad as you say it was. Force once someone used ...
Jun 7, 2011 -
Re: Random
I agree with Snoink, it seems like you were fighting writers block, and well, it was extremely raw. And you had no punctuation, AT ALL. I'm sitting here , dragging ...
Jun 7, 2011 -
Re: Anxiety
It. Was. A Jumble. Of. Words. There. Was. No. Punctuation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fix that, and make some actual lines and this won't be so bad. AND CAPITALIZE YOUR I's!!!! No i like ...
Jun 7, 2011 -
Re: "I Love You," You Said
That was as deep as Lake Baikal, it was awesome, I felt the emotion come trembling out of the words and into my head, it was perfect. I couldn't have ...
Jun 7, 2011 -
Re: Fathers-Loved By God
Great poem, I wish it had never ended. The entire poem was so moving, like you knew exactly what you were going on about. Great job, I couldn't have done ...
Jun 6, 2011 -
Re: Love in the pond.
I think you did a wonderful job, I would nitpick but I'm not in the mood at this second and you have quite a large amount of reviews already that ...
Jun 6, 2011 -
Re: Evolution
Not a bad poem, it was a valiant effort, you gave it a good shot but the rhyming was all helter-skelter and ihhhhhh. It could do with a load of ...
Jun 6, 2011 -
Re: In the Shadow of Your Wings
I liked the rhyme scheme and how you had the poem flow. I could feel the love, or whatever you were trying to convey. The poem... was good... even great... ...
Jun 6, 2011 -
Re: Bitterly-sweet
Finally, some punctuation. One of the only times anybody has ever used punctuation, that I've seen, though I do see a slight lack of commas, but the poem overall was ...
Jun 6, 2011 -
Re: Things I Just Have to Say
Use stanzas/paragraphs/breaks PLEASE! It is so difficult to read if you don't. But otherwise, I love your name (unsocialbutterfly), brilliant, and yes life is hard, and you deserve to rant ...
Jun 6, 2011
