Ieatworms

I agree with Chevy about the comma (or semicolon) in "You smell like the perfume Impulsion and Caprice should" I realize you probably kept Impulsion and Caprice close together for ...

This is the world's smallest violin playing the world's saddest song just for you (in response to teen-angst-you-broke-my-heart poetry). Grow up. Get laid already. I want the five minutes of ...

Wow. Good wordsmithing. You came across as very sagacious and deep. I love the title (I saw you mention it in the Launderette's thread, and went looking for it.) I'd ...

Momentum I’ve laced my shoes and slouched my socks And hit the pavement, Jogging. I’m not warmed up; I’m not prepared, And yet I’ve started Running. I’ve reached the crest; ...

Lovely, just lovely. You made effective use of repetition. 'Like an old cheesy movie" clashes a bit with your more profound imagery.

If this was set to music, I'd surely rock out to it. I have to admit, though, that I almost did not read it because of the title. A Yin ...

Beautiful inmagery, but I am unsure as to your intent. You lost me at the 4th line. Christmas?

I liked the cadence you established with the first stanza "down in the dark where ideas lurk like twisting steamy vapours amidst cold trees; there you will find me" I'd ...

You captured a nice moment here. I agree, though, that some wording needs work. My body sweats From the warm glow Of your love for me Of your eyes My ...

"The grass waves goodbye without feeling, stuck on the thought that the wind will never leave." I like the irony here- that the grass can only wave "goodbye" while the ...

Your best yet

Here’s how it’s gonna work, Princess. He’ll love you first— Not best— ‘Cuz you’re gonna screw up you’re gonna screw him over. You’re gonna Break his heart, Princess. And This ...

I love this site. It has been a great inspiration for me. I would only like to see a bit more decorum, and see debates remain debates. (That goes for ...

I think this is my favorite poem I've read on this site so far. You really have a grasp on the power of words, so you don't need to use ...

I bit wordy... actually, it sounds a lot like an english major. Just remember that words mean more but count for less in poetry. Verbal sounds and images ccount for ...