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Re: Delusion
This is interesting Jasmine. But I was a little confused about this wording. She was tired, her body still weak from Pennsylvania, her head aching from where it slammed against ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: dismantle the sun [1]
I like this. It has a nice rhythm to it and it sorta reminded me of The Giver for some reason. One thing though, I couldn't really get a sense ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: The March Review Day Check-In Thread
I am so happy. I'm not at the very top anymore. :D Hmmm, maybe I'll attempt to reach 100 reviews total today....
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: Fallout
I love this imagery. I'm glad you used proper punctuation in your poem, not many people do. I am confused as to what the poem is meant to be talking ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: Balloon
This is poetic. I like the format of the poem. I think it works for the poem. There were two things that I didn't understand though. I still get butterflies ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: Favorites Hurt
This was an interesting poem. One thing though. It's not one large sentence. Please, put periods at the end of your sentences. Poems are just like prose; they need punctuation ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: The Hills Song
It rhymes! This was a nice, short, poem. Now I am wondering what happened to the speaker. This 'cause now my knee kills. sounded a little odd to me though. ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: Deserted
I like the fact that you used proper punctuation in your poem. Not many people seem to be doing that...Good job. However, I do not like this part though. runs ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: My heart
I like your imagery. It's a nice poem and gave me a warm feeling. One thing though. Please use proper punctuation in your sentences. Someone told me, once, that a ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: Nightmares Prologue
I like your imagery. This makes me want to read more, but at the same time I feel like this is a dream. This sentence sounded a little awkward to ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: An Ode to lost love.
It's short. I like it. One thing though, even though it's a poem it's good to have proper punctuation. A poem is like prose, they both have sentences. I love ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: The Great Sufferings of Paul
I liked this. So Paul is an alien...interesting. I love the image of his agent carrying him to the stage. :D This bothered me though. Just then the door is ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: Story Eight- The Pain I
I liked this in the beginning, but then I got confused. In the middle it took a sudden turn and became fantasy. There wasn't really a hint of fantasy in ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: Avari- Polite Conversation
This is very short. It's interesting enough to make me want to read more, but it seems unfinished. I'm not sure who these people are right now. I read your ...
Mar 27, 2011 -
Re: Principle's Death
Wow, E this is.....I could see the entire story in my head. Only one thing seemed a little odd to me...Why would he have a Gun's and Ammo magazine after ...
Mar 27, 2011
