HostofHorus

Missing You You told me not that you were leaving, You told me not of what I wanted to hear, You simply left me grieving, Growing sadder with each tear. ...

I really like the way you write, and the way you describe things... Maybe use that to give us a setting? We don't know much from this first chapter, hopefully ...

I agree a little with GregPugn, but not to such a large degree. You went overboard on the ..... That is not needed... Try a few more descriptive words, and ...

I agree a lot with smorgishborg. Still, however I do like the meaning behind this. It is so true. Keep writing!

Not bad, I don't quite get the arrangement at the end though... maybe I'm just dumb but could someone help me out.... haha :D Really well written though!

I'm not to fond of the repeating of the "Fear not," however I did like it. Some of the rhyming could use some work! I love the last stanza!

I'm in the middle on it, I don't really have anything to say on what I didn't like about it however.... I did like the format, and I liked the ...

I completely agree... It was almost exactly like The Hunger Games, thus I think ruining what could have a been a huge series right up there with the dreaded Twilight ...

I know, I don't quite like the black hole line either.... I'm trying to think of a way to change it. The message I'm trying to convey, relates mostly to ...

This is my first poem really to speak of. I wrote it in like 2 minutes, because I wanted to make a point on something I really feel strongly about. ...

I really like it. Great writing. Nice ending, keeps the reader thinking, and allows us to add our own thing! I like it!

K, I'm new to poetry. I don't know, this was a good. I liked it. Didn't love it but liked it. For one of your first posts, it is pretty ...

It's ok. Could be something really good. Sounds to me like a mix of The Lightning Thief and Harry Potter, which is why I'm not as intrigued.

K, can I start by saying I have no idea how you came up with all of the names. I like them, and they are very original. I liked it, ...

How was telling him to sit rude? It would have been ruder to keep him standing. It wasn't what he was asking so much as how he asked him. Um, ...