GenShawklan

Hello! :) I'm GenShawklan. So far, I think your story is off to a nice start. I only had two complaints: 1. The beginning - waking up from a dream ...

This was formerly "Sand in a Bottle," but I have since changed the title and most of the plot line. :) I like it much better though, now. I'm looking ...

PART ONE Chapter One Katie Sometimes I think I remember my mom, but most of the time I’m not sure if what I remember is an actual memory or just ...

This wasn't too bad, although I do think the whole vampire thing is a little bit cliched now, especially after Twilight. I didn't feel like there was much of a ...

So, I wrote this for a personal experience narrative for English class a while ago. It's a true story, and my own secret goal for this was to make my ...

This has the potential to be kind of cool. :) I think some parts could use some work; rather than saying you were thinking about your love for your family, ...

Oh. My. Gosh. That was AWESOME!!! I love it! Great job! The only thing I found was that I believe it's spelled 'fuschia.' :) ~GenShawklan

This is neat! :) I like how it's kind of abstract and not just flat out a flower. Maybe one thing you could do is add several colors of green ...

This was a nice short story! :) I just have a few things you could improve: I laughed, but walked him to my car and drove him to the airport. ...

Prologue Odd, how in this most dire situation, I noticed and remembered the most mundane of details; things that I never would’ve given a second glance to any other time, ...

At the top of the hill, there is a tree. In the summer, it is green and lush. In the winter, the lush leaves disappear and expose only bare branches. ...

But that quickly, it was already too late. The truck’s screeching breaks, the horrid smell of burning rubber, and my beautiful mother’s blood staining the road, would always be seared ...

Hi ninjacookiemonster! I'm hoping to get a few more reviews for Wings, the new novel I've started. Here's links to the first two chapters. Please give honest criticism! :) viewtopic.php?t=64016 ...

Hello Arya56227! I think this novel is off to a great start, and I had a few comments I wanted to share with you. :) If this was hell it ...

__________________________________________________________________________________________ Okay so this is the NEW Chapter One of Wings - to those of you who read the old first chapter, that old first