Gahks

This is powerful stuff. I love the way you evoke the artistry of Brady's work so beautifully and with such respect for him and those he documented. The piece could ...

Being someone who's morbidly obsessed with creative writing when hardly anyone else is (well, I suppose the GCSE/A Level students have some sort of excuse - revision etc.), I thought ...

Hey there Bookgeek! Welcome! :D What sort of things do you enoy writing? Do you have any hobbies or interests? Feel free to PM me if anything's bugging you. See ...

Hey there from England! Welcome! What sort of stuff do you like to write? Hope you enjoy it here. Gahks

Hey there from England! :D Welcome to YWS! What exactly is Naruto? An anime/manga thing? What sort of stuff do you like to write? What interests do you have? Feel ...

What this essay lacks is COHESION and STRUCTURE. At the moment, it feels like you're jumping around from one point to the next - it's too disjointed. Like some other ...

Maybe not "the well-televised Columbine massacre that I would like to tell you about," but "Take the well-televised Columbine massacre." This would sound more natural and less stilted. "Bullying" as ...

Do it from a dog's POV about cats!

Tourist The first thing that strikes you Is the heat. The unrelenting Punishment of the sun. The smells of Opium, incense and dust smother you In a suffocating blanket. Everyone ...

Hey there from England! :D Welcome to YWS! What sort of hobbies/interests do you have? Feel free to PM me if anything's on your mind. Gahks (that's 'garks').

Hey there from England! :D Welcome! Hope you have fun!

The ending's abrupt and effective. This piece would really benefit from better spacing and a syntax/punctuation clean-up. I agree with Sleeping Valour in that 'murder' seems like the wrong word ...

Do you like playing music in the background when you write? I like playing soft, mellow music.

Agreed. This poem seems too artificial and forced. Don't use too much anaphora (starting with the same phrase over and over and over again). Use it sparingly, to spice up ...

Go to "Read & Review" and look at other people's views. When you've done 2 reviews, you can start submitting work yourself. Try to keep your review to submission ratio ...