Formslipper

@Anyone who hasn't read the prologue first, do so. Yeah, yeah, I know- it's long! I didn't realize it was so long until I transferred it from my word doc ...

I read it. Very well done, Grandison- everything flowed together, but I'm still a little confused. While these two characters are step-siblings, they like to flirt with each other (which ...

@Jellybean, Meh... Maybe I'll just nix that whole dialogue, or make Jonah ponder over it. I really want this to be realistic and for Jonah to resent his wealthy status ...

I read all of what you said. Thank you so much for the review! All these edits are really great, and I love your comments on the pace (i.e.- too ...

Alright, here it is. It's long for a prologue, I know. Everything in it, though, is essential to the plot. Please... PLEASE!!!!!!!!... please be honest! If you hate it, I ...

I read it. And I think you should make it longer. You see- I had a desirous feeling at the end where I simply wanted more. Also, your questions were ...

I read it. I especially enjoyed her conscious struggle against death, because older writers haven't touched on anything like that yet (or so I've seen). I always like anything original, ...

I read it. You must know, I'm scathingly honest. Is there a "Soliloquy" section to put this in? Where's the characters, the conflict, the setting? Why is this popular?

I read it. It seems that this isn't fiction, like you wrote it from experience. If it's true love you want, humans ain't gonna have it. God offers so much ...

Definitely not footnotes! It'll be hard to incorporate explanations of diabetic terms into your text, but if you do it, people will understand it better. Ooh! Suggestion. What if you ...

Haha, it's decent content then! Angel being thrown out of heaven- I liked it. Did you read my review and look over the changes I made? If you learn to ...

I read it. For only thirteen years old, this is pretty good! When I was thirteen, I stunk at writing- at fifteen I'm not even that great. But I see ...

I read it. Emotion is always excellent, because words can only go so far. I don't understand diabetes, though. If you put the disease's references into an elementary-level vocabulary, then ...

I read it. Good work, Renn. Can I tell you something? Your writing style is virtually the same as mine was a year ago. That's not to say your overall ...

I read it. Anna seems to be the opposite of Shawn, which is good- everything needs an antithesis. I never nit pick, so nothing to say there. All's great, so ...