Finchley

WOW I really like this. As in, ALOT. But I was just wondering what you intended in a few places here and there. ............................................................. "So everyday it's all the

“i am,” she said “the kind of girl you don’t see around these parts.” “oh really?” he said, raising a dark eyebrow. she didn’t like the look of him but ...

*takes a long, deep breath* Wow . This was beautiful. It was very powerful, and sucked me in. For some reason, I normally avoid the longer poetry pieces, and I ...

while I truly do value your suggestions, I don't appreciate being talked down to, or my work being treated like the way it is. I'm sorry to get snotty, but ...

This is really crazy abstract, but the style itself fits with what you're saying. The rhythm is kind of strange, though, so maybe that's something you might want to think ...

I disagree with Cheeky - I thought the ending brought it back around and tied it up in a nice, neat little box. Your words really flow (they don't drag ...

let’s be honest here. no one’s looking. so, I think I just might be in love with you. but I’m not certain – it’s just this feeling I have. Do ...

It's really crazy flirty but kinda raw in some places (most of those have been pointed out already). Perhaps a little more description about the school and the class would ...

This is obviously really personal, so I won't say too much. However there are a few raw spots that don't quite seem to match, like "You're so special to me" ...

It's very depressing, but I like the overall style of it, if that makes any sense. And the last line is the best out of the whole poem. I feel ...

Wow... I don't think I've ever read any of your poetry. Well, I mean serious poetry. Do haikus about socks count? I'm not sure. Anyway, I really love the way ...

In one stanza you used 'hold' at the end of the line, and in the next, you used 'behold' and it was kind of repetetive. But I think everyone else ...

guess what? It’s three in the AM (in the morning), dear and all the world is dead but I’ve got nothing more than our conversations half-running through my head. I ...

Just one thing I noticed - I believe the creative side is on the right, not the left. And at times, the dialogue seemed a little...forced... I guess. But really, ...

It's pretty realistic - I usually shy away from coarser dialogue, but yours is so tangible and real. Funny and ironic story... and the ending is perfect. is this something ...