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Repetition, when used wisely, can be a very effective way to accent your poetry. Unfortunately, you haven't used it very wisely here. There is nothing of substance to this poem; ...

Hullo there! Reading this, one thing jumped out at me right away--your rhyme scheme. That, for multiple reasons, is something you do not want to happen. The whole purpose of ...

Au revoir, Ari! I can't wait to hear all the stories you have to share--there's got to be a lot of them waiting for you there, da? ^^ You'll do ...

Oh, I can't wait for this one! Name: Elias Fletcher Age: 19 Race: Mixed. Caucasian father, Spanish mother. Gender: Male Height: 5'10"/177 cm Weight: 145 lbs/65.8 kg Crewmen

I would be insulted if someone who so obviously disdained my life-choices gave me a label I didn't care for. Asking "if its so irrelivent to you then why do ...

Amazing, Nate! Maybe this'll weed out the writers who aren't serious about improving and working. Fingers crossed, da? A brilliant move. =)

This is quite lovely; I really enjoy the technique, and I hope you develop it further and really perfect it. The faint silhouette is a wonderful touch, and I love ...

I really like this technique, and I'd love to see you further develop it and perfect it. The movement, and the intensity of the contrast, are both absolutely lovely.

Very nice! As Meg points out, his lips are a little weird, and the left side of his face is curiously lacking in shape, but I love the whole concept; ...

Oneeyedunicornhunter: And what, pray tell, is wrong with beginning sentences halfway through a line? No poet I know would object. Shakespeare, Milton, and Donne all do so. Hell, even the ...

Lol. This should be a senryu, not a haiku, right? Haikus are more specific, nature-centered and sober. Senryus tend more towards the blithe and ironic. Otherwise--dreadlocks? Ew! The always smell ...

Oh, The Name of the Rose! I love that book. It's not an easy one, though, is it? I'm reading his The Island of the Day Before now--at least, I ...

The walk-out looks like fun, Saint! ^_^ We did that once my freshman year of high school and everyone was suspended. I wasn't among them, mostly because my mom worked ...

;) Anything for you, Ed!

The rhymes weren't bad, and for a navel-gazing poem, this was surprisingly lacking in the irritating qualities of most of its mates. I actually enjoyed this a lot; parts of ...