Fabien

If YOU are the last person on earth and someone knocks on your door - then the person behind it would be the reaper. That is just my opinion and ...

Rows of shattered car windows on either side of the street; triggered by ascending drug use. As we walked through the courtyard, broken glass littered the cobblestones, crunching under our ...

Nameless men come crawling out of the alleys through the dark architecture of a summer night. A writer with his dirty, empty briefcase, drags his feet across the concrete wallowing ...

Your title should read "The Devil's Walk" you've forgotten the apostrophe. In the opening paragraph, "The Words were embossed...", the 'W' should be lowercase. In your second paragraph, " I ...

1. We go to the party with a present and have a jolly good time even if it is a bit crap. 2. We go to the party without a ...

Well, well, well, this story is intriguing. Why haven't I decided to read it till now? And I'm only at the beginning! I like the development of your characters and ...

I liked this, it caught my eye. I didn't like the first part in the the way that I didn't like the old man [not your work though]. It was ...

"The Flower Not The Knife" - Sliced & Diced Version Look on the bright side of life, think of the flower not the knife. One can be bleak, but there ...

Darling, don't you know that time will show where we stand together now? Sadly it will be so. I so desperately want you to know this, and won't you even ...

You know critiques are all opinion, right? Don't change your piece to please others, just change it or leave it be to please yourself. When I first read this, it ...

I really enjoyed this piece. It was real refreshing and I like how you went about it with the style and the rhyming. I feel poems like these could be ...

So, nice idea, it sure took a sharp turn. Your line structure is off, I hit a lot of potholes and it was rather bumpy. You need commas in there ...

So this piece was to the point, it shows that you miss him, but that in itself is a little cliche. Maybe if you expressed why you missed him it ...

[*erased*]

I wrote this when I was fourteen, I wasn't writing happy stuff back then. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Desperado Danny In Despair" (original title)