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Re: Romeo & Juliet: Instant Messaging Edition
Awesome. Funny and creative. This was great to read for the Romeo and Juliet portion of my English final. lol jk. I hope you got an A, because this is ...
May 19, 2011 -
Re: Water Under The Bridge Chapter Seven: Anna
One, two…three…four…five, six pills down. Sigh. Seven, eight—Two more today. Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one —ten seconds on inhaler #1. Do it again. Rinse mouth. ...
May 18, 2011 -
Re: Water Under The Bridge Chapter Six: Shawn
Cassie has not shut up the whole way home. Her teacher is great, she’s made friends, this new school is so much better. Glad she had so much fun. I ...
May 9, 2011 -
Re: Water Under The Bridge Chapter Five: Brooklynn
Brooklynn Noelle Walters. 5’7, blonde hair, expressive crystal blue eyes. By that description, people might say I’m a beautiful young girl with a beautiful, modern name. Too bad that’s all ...
May 4, 2011 -
Re: Water Under The Bridge Chapter Four: Ryan
I definitely understand what you mean about establishing setting, in this chapter in particular. I can see why you were confused. I'll fix that. I get the back story. It ...
May 3, 2011 -
Re: Water Under The Bridge Chapter Four: Ryan
Okay. thanks. This is a chapter that I've thought has needed editing/adding. the next chapter is better. Could you suggest how I could add depth? Ryan gets better as this ...
May 3, 2011 -
Re: Water Under The Bridge Chapter Four: Ryan
Not sure why it bunched together so much. You said it was good...but you also said it lacked emotion and detail. ? I know this chapter isn't great. I've always ...
May 3, 2011 -
Re: Water Under The Bridge Chapter One: Shawn
I totally agree about the structure of sentences in this first chapter. I read it back over and couldn't believe what I was thinking. Just need to get around to ...
May 2, 2011 -
Re: Water Under The Bridge Chapter Four: Ryan
My mom is on the phone crying when I get home from soccer and my older brother Adam wraps his strong arms around my sweaty frame. “What’s going on?” I ...
May 2, 2011 -
Re: Chapter One
Looks like everyone else took care of the rest, but I'd just like to add in my two cents. I'm anxious to know more about both of them, and how ...
May 1, 2011 -
Re: What Is Your Favorite Writing Tip?
This picture says it all :) Also, in writing you can get right what you got wrong in real life
Apr 24, 2011 -
Re: Heart disease
Not sure about valves, but check out this page for a list of types of congenital heart disease. Not all of these are congenital, so make sure to read carefully. ...
Apr 24, 2011 -
Re: Wake up Mama, wake up. Ch 2
No, they do not bring them into their own home; the children are taken to foster homes. Don't get discouraged! That's what this site is for: to make us all ...
Apr 22, 2011 -
Re: Wake up Mama, wake up. Ch 2
I'm gonna be mean first, and then I'll tell you what I liked. The biggest thing I noticed is you're doing a lot of "telling" when you should be "showing". ...
Apr 21, 2011 -
Re: Wake up Mama, wake up. Ch 1
Interesting concept. But I think you need to proofread the grammar. The plot felt a little jumpy to me. I didn't understand that time had passed. Also, it's COMA not ...
Apr 21, 2011