Dethl

I must say that so far it seems kind of charming, but you shouldn't abuse of adjectives. Keep spacing in mind, because your chapter is just a huge paragraph, and ...

Good Chapter :D. But there is something that I don't get, In the second part of the chapter you use first person narrative, but as far as I understand this ...

Great beginning, I like how you introduced the reader with the fight, and I also love Ailia's personality. I don't really have any complainment or suggestion about this. Waiting for ...

The Preface was amazing! It left that mysterious feeling that makes people continue reading, but I must say that the first chapter wasn't that good. The dream was detailed, but ...