Derek

Something about this chapter is weird to me, after reading it. A little cheese, a little "unrealistic", which is surprisingly easy to do despite the fact that it is, unrealistic. ...

Bravo sir, an excellent short story. You said in the previous part it was in the same world as your novel? That is a very cool way of fleshing out ...

I really liked this, you gave a good look at the world without going into too much obvious detail, showing the world slowly instead of throwing it all into a ...

Just did an edit on it!(after all your wonderful suggestions). Hope you like the revised.

*I am proud of this more so then my other chapters, I hope you enjoy reading it cause I enjoined writing it!* Chapter 7: Suspension Viewpoint: Annabeth The gym, despite ...

Emotional. It was well written, enough for me to feel bad for the kid, which is always a good thing, especially in a short story. Noticed a few grammar mistakes ...

I like the art style of these. Very Zelda: Wind Waker lol. First picture is really cool, and the last one, those are my favorite ones. I'm defiantly not here ...

Helen The cupboard was bare, that was the first thing I noticed. Someone had been at this safe house recently and none of the resistance had been to replace the ...

This is a longer chapter then most of mine, more then 2000+ words. I do really like this though, my Emeth chapters seem to always be my favorite, perhaps because ...

“And I almost cost my closest friend two fingers and someone to share the weight of the whole situation with.” She let out yet another frustrated sigh, and all of ...

Opps....I made a mess xP. I posted the next chapter without posting the previous chapter, so if you are reading this in chapter order(aka, my novel) do not read this ...

Chapter 3: Superbia Viewpoint: Riley What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear your name? Do you hope it is person you love calling out to ...

Chapter 2 Viewpoint: Lydia My focus was on the book in front of me. Despite the ringing of the bell I was reluctant to break my concentration but like usual ...

Wow that was longer then I was expecting it to be ha. Anyway, you did a really good job on this I must say. The only thing I can really ...

Chapter 1: Irritum Viewpoint : Annabeth Once upon a time their was a princess. By the goddess which she was named her duty was to protect the people in her ...