DeadEndsAreOptional

I just noticed that right now, I will change it. Thanks for the review!

I will be sure to change the past/present tense mix-ups. Thanks for the review! :)

I love how the beginning starts, it made me want to read more. It's a great story so far! You wrote it very well. The only thing that you might ...

I have posted the second part up! You can go here to read it:

**I'm sorry, but I have removed this work from this site. But if you would like to read an excerpt of this story go here: - DeadEndsAreOptional

Thank you for the review! You're suggestions has helped me greatly; I'll work on the flaws and hopefully the story will improve. :D

I'm sorry it confused you, I'll work on that! It's set now days, in the second part hopefully you can tell that (I haven't yet posted the second part, but ...

** I'm sorry, but I have removed this work from this site. You can read my other work here: - DeadEndsAreOptional

I love it so far! That was a very a good idea to start with him in trial, but it was a little rushed in the trial. Otherwise, the story ...

** I'm sorry, but I have removed this work from this site.

Question: She opened her eyes and stared face to face with German. Was she dreaming or hallucinating that German was dead? Other then that it's an interesting story so far, ...

It's a very good start in a story, it's described very well (I like that). I like how you said' her red eyes roamed the valley, glistening like rubies set ...

Thanks for all the help on my mistakes! I'll work more on my description, thanks again for the tips/suggestions (they'll help me a lot). :)

** I'm sorry but I have removed this story. But you can look at my other work here: - DeadEndsAreOptional

I like how you worded this poem, very mysterious and interesting. I especially like the part ( My hand is a mystery, you see, Something I never understood very clearly. ...