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Re: Alex
Hey, so first of all, I really liked it. It was a little bit confusing (I guess because I'm not really used to this form). But here are somethings I ...
Oct 28, 2011 -
Re: Divine Drink
Hey, so I enjoyed the essay, it was really enjoyable to read. I don't breakfast, you know. I'm not really sure what you're trying to say in this sentence. The ...
Oct 21, 2011 -
Re: Divine Drink
Hey, so I enjoyed the essay, it was really enjoyable to read. I don't breakfast, you know. I'm not really sure what you're trying to say in this sentence. The ...
Oct 21, 2011 -
Re: The Reason for Rain: Chapter Three
Hey, so I think this is a very good build up. But, I do think in the next chapter you should introduce the love intrest. The grammar and overall usage ...
Oct 21, 2011 -
Re: Dancing In The Moonlight
Hi, to start off, I didn't think it was absolutely terrible, in fact, it was quite memorable. There were some parts where, yeah, it was a little cheesy, but you ...
Oct 15, 2011 -
Re: Sisterhood - Prologue
I like the beginning of this story, it has a good set up. But in the last paragraph, I would try splitting it into two paragraphs. The grammar is good, ...
Aug 20, 2011 -
Re: Entry for Story Title Contest
1. Book where D.C. is nuked, the military takes over the government, and a team of undercover black-ops seek and destroy the group that nuked D.C. Name: Seek ‘N Destroy? ...
Aug 20, 2011 -
Re: Over The Wall
This is really good. I liked how you repeated the lines, to give it more emphasis. There are some places where I would of used a different word, but that's ...
Aug 20, 2011 -
Re: Random...Thanks
I enjoyed this, but I think you should space out stanza instead of just one huge mass of lines. Also, I think you should add some commas here and there, ...
Aug 20, 2011 -
Re: An Adventure In A Cave
I liked this a lot, but there are a few places I'd like to discuss. She had been taking a quiet, moonlit stroll on the sands when it had suddenly ...
Aug 20, 2011 -
Re: The Garden
I liked this poem, a lot. I didn't find any grammar errors, and they vocabulary you used was pretty good. I liked the kind of eerie essence you had, it ...
Aug 20, 2011 -
Re: Midnight Dance
This is a really good poem, and I can't write poetry so I really enjoy reading it. And this entertained me. I'm sure you know of pricey pretty places I ...
Aug 18, 2011 -
Re: Im Too Young For Love
I liked it, but I think it needs more of a plot which you could develop. Just this doesn't tell us anything about the characters or really the story at ...
Aug 18, 2011 -
Re: (Needs a Title, Ideas Welcome!) Prologue
Kiki sat down next to me and put a comforting hand on my bare knee. My bed creaked under the pressure of the extra weight. She turned toward my opened ...
Aug 16, 2011 -
Re: The Most Awesome Story Ever
This made me laugh. I liked the humor and the nice message in the end. So, I think I might read some of your other works because you said they ...
Aug 15, 2011
