ClaraKingofSnow

Just saying that the three forums below are: Do you + Imagine... + Dreams. :) Insperation maybe? :) Yeah, I learned a technique kind of like that at a writing ...

Thanks, Ziggiefred. I agree with what you're saying. I'll get back to you when I've edited it some more. :) ClaraKingofSnow

Do you imagine dreams? Or are they potent with reality? Ask the stars: they say that nightmares empower and that dreams are misunderstood, spread like violence. (They claw beneath my ...

Firstly, please do not write prefaces to your work. Onwards. I like this and I don't like it. I don't like that you used a porcelain doll as the subject ...

I think either you should end it at "and he pointed my black present at me" or write a better ending. Am I right in thinking that the current ending ...

I love-love-love your first line, but the rest kind of fell apart for me. What you really want to show in the poem is passion and lust, yeah? So get ...

I like the "Dear Diary" format, but why is there a dream at the beginning? If you're going to tell us something about it in the diary entry, then omit ...

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Oh geez, this is still making me laugh. "...and Bella won’t do anything but give me those freaky bedroom eyes. She’s crazy! She’s ...

Blue = my suggestions I feel a part of me is dying Yet nothing's being born anew. I just want the gift back I once had (finish here) , The ...

(I'm addressing points stanza by stanza.) You honestly think it's as simple as that? You told her lies, To cover up the truth, And you sat there and thought, "It's ...

I kind of expected some greater metaphor or more explosive ending. (Sorry, I'm not a fan of any branch of the military.) I don't like the "for"s that begin the ...

Yeah, I agree that it fell flat. I wrote it in maybe five minutes and left it alone. I'll definitely post more poetry that's been contemplated and revised over and ...

Sheesh, this is really long. Anyways, I'll just jump right to the points that I don't think have been made. I agree that your description and metaphors are very nice, ...

Wow, thanks! I'll try both of your suggestions (and probably any others); they make sense because I can totally write a really good short memoir piece. :)

Hi poojaaa16! I like the idea, but for a first chapter, this is a bit bland. I know it's so cliché, but 'show, don't tell' is a good mantra to ...