Charliebo

If, in some deep, unthought of place, The dead could congregate with grace, They'd shuffle, wartorn, timid, bold, All breathless in the dusty cold, Of every race, creed and kin, ...

I see the scraps of morning Gently amble over-head, The farm-cat fiercely yawning Stretching, Scratching on my bed. All about, The air is thick with Light anticipation As i slip ...

i like it. It had a good style, and it's interesting. However, if you are interested in making some changes, i have some suggestions. (if not look away now!:)) ok, ...

Above the town, The sky is split And tugged from east to west by clouds. Tiny black holes Buzz like reversed stars in the morning light. And below, The town ...

i really do think that this is a brilliant poem. i love war poetry. it's my favourite type, and you did it well. firstly, i think that the introduction of ...

Well, it was very poetical. It had some lovely elements, but there are some bits in the middle that were repetitive - not always a bad thing, but can judder ...

this is a very interesting poem. I like the fact that it isn't about the usual. The content is more interesting than the regular love stuff etc., and it was ...

k guys, this was simply scribbled in a pensive moment, so don't take it to be anything proffessional - it was literally just a thought. But criticism is (almost) always ...

well, i kind of agree to the person above who said that there were too many farewells. I understand totally that that is the idea and the essence of the ...

oh i loved it! Some bits more than others. I wasn't so sure about the line in the second stanza about fire and desire, because it's quite an obvious and ...

Snow is flaking from clouds In gentle, wistful breaths. She stands. She watches. The milky dancers cascade. They float noiselessly To the icy floor, Shifting skies – pink-white to grey. ...

Thanks a bunch - very constructive, though i'm afraid i haven't decided to scrap the entire first stanza; i'm too atatched to it! However, i really apreciate your comments and ...

WALKER I watched the sun rise over the trench. Gorgeous rays of red tinted with orange. It looked like spilled watercolour on wet golden paper. Creases folded where the paint ...

Hello! I really loved some of the lines in here, the ideas that you had and the pictures that they made in my mind. It was well thought out! The ...

Hello. That was such a lovely poem - you probably already figured that out by the amount of people who've taken the time to comment! It seemed to me as ...