CRL

Alright here's the second edited segment, and again I apologize for posting these really long parts but it's just not worth it to give you five more segments that have ...

I've made a few minor edits to Part One and instead of posting in five more segments like I did with the unedited version (which would be basically pointless as ...

Good story! It works pretty well as a standalone (even though you said it was a sequel) and I found it very interesting and intriguing. Your characters are well-defined, and ...

Really, really nice poem. Even in something this short you managed to convey so much emotion that it gave an instant connection. Great job!

Good job with this (as always). Just a few more nit-picky things; the "shoot" in laundry "shoot" should be "chute." Train of thought is usually singular (I've never seen it ...

These are the final two chapters in Part One of Blur the Lines. Note, none of the chapters are edited yet, and in a few days I will post the ...

Wow, this is getting really good. You fixed every nit-picky grammatical thing that was wrong with the first chapter, and I loved the flashback itself. Just one thing, the rule ...

I know I've been posting in three-chapter increments, but these were both a little long so I thought that I would post now. And if you haven't read the first ...

Thanks to both of you. VAF3, I owe you a special thanks because your poem probably inspired some of the storyline here, and I'm glad you liked it! Also, AuthorLeesa, ...

I'm not very accustomed to poetry, but when this idea came I decided to try. It came out a little long (who am I kidding, it's very long), so please ...

I am a white American of European descent and I try to preach this message to every person I know. Some of my best friends are Muslim and I hate ...

That's a good idea, and it probably would improve your point of view (I was going to mention that in my first review but I guess I forgot). I've actually ...

Wow thanks. I've been trying to write a novel for a while and I thought this was probably my best yet. Nice to know someone else liked it too! And ...

Nice job, I really enjoyed the story itself. You managed to pack a lot into a small chapter, and I really can't wait to hear more. However I did notice ...

Very, very good. Kudos for turning something from the Theme Generator into a nice read. Loved the story itself, it kept me hanging pretty well and then gave that emotional ...