BelarusBirdy

Sorry.

I also find the rhyme scheme to be annoying at times. It lacks some flow, but the overall message is pretty good. If you need more rhymes, just say the ...

This is fantastic! Keep writing poetry, you're really good! I love it so much, and I can really relate to it.

Name: Rain Storm Crypti Age: 15 Element: Water and Sound Physical description: Pale skin that burns badly in the sun, so she tends to stay in the shadows. She can't ...

Twelve runaways (ages 12-18) find out they are really part of an ancient race of almost human beings. They live indefinitely, and each has control over an element. (Fire and ...

I think I'm a floor above where I was. I can hear clattering from the vents, but it sounds like it's far away. Some girl screaming like a baby, close ...

I think it's a very original idea, and I liked the ending.

(later) I don't know how much time has passed, but light is filtering through a loose tile overhead. There are footsteps, but they sound like they're on the floor above, ...

Storm: The alarms are going off two floors up. I should be waiting for the guards to come and fetch me from this room, but I don't really want to ...

I noticed a few grammatical errors, and I'll point them out here. I'll also add a few different word choices. October 30, 1980 I saw him come from his house. ...

When I heard the beginning, I immediately predicted that he meets the twins and they'll try to eat him. I hope I'm wrong, or else it's not going to attract ...

I hope you write another, it was so original!!! I love it!!!

I liked your poem. I thought that while it may not be the MOST original concept, you made it different enough that I didn't quit reading halfway through. I liked ...

This is a very beautiful poem. I have one suggestion on the wording, though. Where you say "be careful in your tread," maybe you could replace it with, "be careful ...

Thanks! I just want to say this again. I don't know if door finish is flammable. DO NOT try this at home OR to escape the asylum you're locked up ...