Bazoo

Maybe you could close with a repeated line or something. I'm really bad at describing poetry techniques, but I don't get enough "feel" with that last line. There was a ...

Ah, that stinks. I haven't talked to Brad in the longest time. Can't wait to talk to Black Rose again...

Um..I can't even remember a lot of the bad books I read... -Series of Unfortunate Events-Seriously, I don't even know how these things keep getting published. Each book is too ...

I liked it, really had a unique message of childhood innonence. Something just really bugged me about that last line, if you know what I mean. I understand you were ...

I'm finally back after a LONG AWOL, I'll bet noone remembers me. =\ Is Brad still here? Is Chevy still here? Is Black Rose still here? I really need to ...

I wub you Warty.

Very beautiful and inspiring as always, Brad... even if it's on the short side. "it still plays for you, but you get so discouraged" I can't quite put my finger ...

Hm... I guess from what I understood, it seemed to be true. But no, I didn't fall asleep. :lol: And hopefully it will become a little more clear as the ...

Wow it's been ages since I've posted here... I was a little questionable at first glance when I saw the (short) length of poem, but once I started reading, I ...

Wow... I have seen so many poems about suicide. Sometimes the topic does get a little dried up. I do like the poem, like most of your other works, Brad. ...

Honestly, I thought the metaphors were a little cliche here and there. But... I was so entranced in the beautiful descriptions I hardly noticed. :P You probably don't need more ...

This speech made me stare at the screen and crack up. So don't be surprised if you hear a chuckle in the audience.

*looks at date* It IS old. o.O Well, it's good to dig up old pieces and see how you've improved since then. I like that first stanza with counting the ...

This really impressed me, Brad. Very good job; the imagery captured my attention well. Mmm... the unicorn line in the second stanza seems a little on the cheesy/cliche end, though... ...

Honestly, I wouldn't say the swearing is 'unnecessary'. It adds a realistic feel, and really pounds the reader into a good atmosphere. Personally, I don't think it's awfully terrible. But ...