AndNeverAgainx3

haha, i love it! no crits; i didn't see any grammatical errors. but it's really great way to start a story. how does the title play into the story?

yes, i do really like it =]] noice beginning!!

the tenses are a bit mixed up i like your style but maybe you should establish a bit more of a storyline. keep writing!

i read it. i loved it. it's my kind of story! you SHOULD space between paragraphs, but it's not THAT hard to read.

i like diary stories, but i think you should provide a little bit more information in the entries. we want to be introduced to the writer, not JUST laurie. unless ...

bayside...i'm pretty sure that's the name of a band... something with bay in it. ANYhoo, oo intriguing. NOT exactly boy meet girl like i thought, more so druggie-meets-and-corrupts-girl. very unique. ...

me gusta mucho. =]] i like boy meets girl stories. or whatever you wanna call em.

roya. it wasn't THAT cliche. i liked it! plain and simple. grammatical errors, yes, but others have already corrected that. you write SO MANY different things. i struggle just to ...

-the trauntler wouldn't scuttle-- it would fly. -have coal explain what a phantom is. it's confusing. i'm not telling you to change this part but i'm just saying: HA. adults ...

ohhh okay. i didn't remember the end of the chapter...

chapter name makes andi's brain go: "the phantommmm of the opera is there the phantom is there inside my mind" now that that is out of my system: critz! okay. ...

that's amazing. i don't really have much to critique; i think everyone else has handled the gramamtical errors well enough on their own. i just turned 14 and i love ...

you love MY style? i love YOUR style. great descriptions and details and everything =]] if you liked that chapter, that's just an excerpt from the novel. i have the ...

i love it. tell her that XD