AVilicious666

Thank you for the comments. ^.^ Everything helps. =] I'll fix the spelling later. I have to get off the comp.

Thank you, Em. ^.^ I still need to get around to editing this. Time is not on my side. >

thank you. i shall look it over. ^.^

AVilicious666> Thanks for the long review and lesson about that commas. Won't use them like that ever again. Promise. You're welcome. ^.^

Your lines are read kind of choppy, and i think it's the fact that you have soooo many commas you don't need. try and write this in paragraph form and ...

First of all, thank you for the crit, even though it's not your strong point. At least you attempted. ^.^ Second of all, the more you crit it, and the ...

The last people are in 'The Golden Compass' It's pretty popular these days, so I figured people might know who they are. Maybe I should make that more clear.. =/ ...

I changed the rating of this poem to R. Please, you don't have to rate things all of the time, but especially if it is R content, rate your work! ...