322sivart

I like it! It was funny, querky, and there's not much to critizize. Do you write other poems like this? -Alex

Excellent. I think it would be perfect if you took out the first stanza, I don't see the connection with the rest of the poem. The rest of it, however, ...

Wow. This is truly unique and amazing. She used to place bets for cigarettes that would burn night after night, a menorah on her lips, hallelujah. I don't really understand ...

Hello Misstoria, The first thing I notice is that you placed this work under "Lyrics". I think that this would be more fitting under Dramatic Poetry. Why do I say ...

Was this meant to be a rap? If so, I can give you a lot of advice because rapping is my poetry of choice (it seems like a rap because ...

Most of these are hilarious! "Imagine" is my personal favorite. Good artwork, too! -Alex

Flesch-Kincaid Grade level: 10. Flesch-Kincaid Reading Ease score: 56 Good to know

I like the idea. Did you think of this, or did you learn it from someone else?

Choppy, but gripping. I'm not crazy about the punctuation you used here, but that's just about all I have to critique you on. It's very deep, and the length and ...

Definately your short story. It really grabbed me from the beginning, and you definately have potential writing prose. "Who's At Fault" is also good, and I think you should revise ...

I love a story with two twists at the end, that's really unique. Just a few things I would change: All I could think about was getting away as fast ...

Truly Amazing. You never went to the funeral; lies didn’t deserve your tears, and so you cried at home with the lights off, and the house dark so he couldn’t ...

Excellent! There were only very minor things that I did catch. In the beginning of the story, I take notes for her... er... I did take notes for her. I ...

This was really good. The pace was right, your two main characters were portrayed perfectly, and the story was very vivid. However, once I got to the part where one ...

Great. If you don't mind, could you check out the first chapter of this novel I posted? No one's commented yet. It's called "The Gold Watch", and you should find ...