Advice?

I've become the advice columnist among my friends, everyone bringing their problems to me and asking for ways to solve them. I don't mind - I actually like being trusted with certain secrets and being trusted to give direction - and it's given me an idea.

I'm going to start my own advice column here. You will remain confidencial though, but signing onto this account:


At the top of your post, you should come up with some alias to go by. You should state your problem, or what you need advice on, and I'll get back to you as soon as possible.

I hope this is successful (and is in the right forum )
Ask away!

Note: While peer-advice is a good thing, any serious questions or problems should be taken to a parent / guardian / doctor.

Hi, Advice peoples!
I'm in love with this guy. And he's in love with me. We've been dating a little over a week, and I want to show him how much I care. Is there anyway I can?
And it has to be text/internet because we don't see each other very often. In fact, we don't ever see each other. I just want something sweet to show him how much I care.
~Star Crossed Lover~

Hey, Star Crossed Lover!

Love, eh? There are several ways to show someone you care about them. Sometimes it's just to listen, to support them, to write a note, or just speak your feelings. It all depends on the person...

I hope this helps!
~ Chief Advisor
(just came up with that name)

[Deleted for Mature Content]

evil_kookies,

First, I wanna say that I'm sorry for what happened to you. I hear about it all the time but have never actually met someone who's gone through something like that. It's good that you're over it and I hope that it doesn't happen ever again.

In answer to your first question, I believe that it would be best that you did go to a clinic. If it's something that you're worried about, what harm would it do if you went ahead and made sure.

As for telling people... If you're serious about your boyfriend, you might want to clue him in, but only if you're okay with what might happen to the relationship if you do... And for telling everyone, it's truly up to you. If you want everyone to know that, go ahead and shout it out. If you have your reservations about it, don't. Just keep it personal. In the end, it's your decision.

About the girl... Maybe if you were the one to tell her, to say what happened in the way you want it to be told, her reaction might not be as you think. It would be better than her finding out on her own and not knowing your half of the story...

I hope this helps,
~ Chief Advisor

Dear Chief Advisor,
I am desperately in need of some advice. I'm at the end of my freshman year and in over my head. In August my best friend / secret boyfriend committed suicide. I struggled with depression for months until with the help of my friends I came back to the land of the living. One of those friends was a boy I'll call "Alex". He helped me through everything. Now "Alex" wants to date and I don't know if I'm ready. I'm afraid that if I tell him that I'm not ready he will ask why and I don't want to tell him that I'm still in love with a dead kid. I know I have to move on but I'm afraid I'll forget him. The bad thing is I really do like "Alex" but I can't let go.
Help,
The Dead Kid's Girlfriend

I

DKG,

Firstly, I'm sorry for your loss. It's good that you've come out of your depression and that you're beginning to start fresh. Just remember - sometimes taking things slow is the best option. If you don't think you're ready for a relationship with "Alex", you should tell him. If he asks why, say that it's a personal issue or that you just aren't ready. Sometimes, you don't need to explain yourself. And if he is as helpful and understanding as it seems, he should be able to have patience with you. If he likes you for the right reasons, he can wait.
As for letting go... I know it's hard, but it has to be done. You won't forget him. If he's created such a space in your heart that this decision is as hard as it is, you'll always be able to remember him. You'll be able to look back and smile in nostalgia, thinking of the best times spent with him and the reasons you've come to love him the way you do. What would he want you to do? Would he want you to be happy? Or would he rather you prevent yourself from ever reaching the happiness you deserve?

I hope this helps and I hope things get better for you,
~ Chief Advisor

Hello rocky! I think its great what your doing.

I have people who always say that I can't do things when I really want to. There are things that I'm trying and they are new weird things that no one in my family has done before. Like learning Japanese, I know I can make it if I try, but they keep pointing out how useless it is. I have no reason to learn it and yet I want to. If I tell them that I just want to learn it they start making it seem like I'm doing an idiotic job and that I won't make it.(my own Bro was surprised when I could start reading a bit ) I know that the obvious thing to do is to ignore them, but I'm the kind of person who words can effect.

Now I have to hide when I want to do something...unususual.

So what do ya say rocky? These people are my family.

Biggles!

Don't hide. If they can't accept you, that's their loss and their personal problem. Just be yourself and don't be afraid of what they think. I know, it's not as easy as it sounds. My family used to think it weird that I would write everyday to the point where I sometimes wouldn't come out of my room. But they learned to deal with it once they realized I wasn't going to change. My father still thinks that I ought to make a career out of it, thinking of it only as that, but I do it for the fun in hopes that maybe someone one day will have the same joy reading it as i've had writing it. Just take a stand, whether it be silent or confrontational, and don't back down. You're their family, they're yours. They'll accept it eventually.

Hope this helps!
~ Chief Advisor