I Can See

I can’t see your face,

I can’t see your smile,

I can’t see your feelings,

But I can see your worth my while,

I can’t see your light,

I can’t see your dark,

But I can see the stars that make you shine and spark,

I can’t see your insides,

I can’t see your harm,

Even though some people think your cause for alarm,

I can see your love,

I can see your virtue,

I can see your heart,

I can see you.

All the "I cans" and "I can'ts" were very annoying, I must say. It remembered me so much of Everytime by Britney Spears.

I really didn't let this it was boring and repetative it has nothing to it, there was not a line the would catch my attention sorry. It just seemed as though you did it in 5 mins because you were bored.
Wu

good job, although i didnt really enjoy it as much as i wanted to, the repetitive, i can's and i can't were quite annoying, plus for me i think the longer lines were a bit hard to say witht he tonning, if you get what i mean. I don't actually understand the full on message you were trying to put across here. But apart from that, vey good job at your poem.
this kinds seemed like you didnt spend that long on it, because some of the rythiming were forced.

In my eyes i believe that this is a poem which has two distinctive responses, without sounding cheesy this poem can be compared to Marmite and what i mean by that is that you either love it or don't.
i for one really like the poem because it has a certain quality which overrides the way you chose to put out the poem.
i Believe that the purpose of the poem is much better then the layout which i mean by the language because to some it can become annoying or boring but for some (such as myself) i find it quite intriguing as it is different which never fails to capture my attention.

Despite the views of others, I liked this poem. It flowed well, and though it was rather repetitive, that was this poem's style, and I can understand that. I wish it had more imagery and and feeling in it, for it left me a bit bland.

can’t see your face,



I can’t see your smile,



I can’t see your feelings,



But I can see you're worth my while.



I can’t see your light,



I can’t see your dark,



But I can see the stars that make you shine and spark,



I can’t see your insides,



I can’t see your harm,



Even though some people think you're cause for alarm, This line didn't really fit in...



I can see your love,



I can see your virtue,



I can see your heart,



I can see you.Beautiful

That's it, really. Nice poem

Heeyy you! I'm Demoness, here's my review!

Hm.. this may be repetative and didn't consist of any imagery or imaginary at all.. Still, I wasn't disturbed by this, it was simple and plain and maybe a bit dull but it still didn't leave me untouched... so, well, it wasn't the most astonishing thing I've ever read but it was definitely worth reading.

Good Luck & Keep Writing

// Demoness

Hello. I'm the Princess of Evil, so this is my review for you, peasant!
Your flow was mostly constant, however I would suggest for this poem to be single-spaced as opposed to double spaced.
Also, I disagree with a previous reviewer that you wrote this out of boredom in five minutes.
However, I do agree that it was rather repetitive.
Your message was brought across clearly, and reminded me of James Cameron's film "Avatar" quite a bit with the whole "I see you" premise.
Also, this may end up to be a good song, if you would consider that.
I've seen many poems like this before so it was a bit generic for my taste, but overall I enjoyed reading it.

I think a little more structure could have done this a world of good. Instead of double spacing the entire thing maybe try something more like:

I can’t see your face,
I can’t see your smile,
I can’t see your feelings,
But I can see your worth my while,

I can’t see your light,
I can’t see your dark,
But I can see the stars that make you shine and spark,

I can’t see your insides,
I can’t see your harm,
Even though some people think your cause for alarm,

I can see your love,
I can see your virtue,
I can see your heart,
I can see you.

That way you have stanzas that are easier to read and more visually appealing. Also, whenever you're about to use "your" or "you're" check to see if you mean "this belongs to you" or "you are", respectively. When it comes to content this is kind of generic and a little dull, but it's a good concept and it can be salvaged with some more careful word choice. It would be more consistent if you added an extra "I can't" line to stanzas two and three and it could help add depth.

Overall it comes off as haphazard. I really believe it can be beautiful with a bit of polishing. I like how you focus on all the wonderful things you see in that person but also accept any flaws that may be lurking in there, keep it up and make this great