The Kitchen Dance

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The Kitchen Dance

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The cozy suburbs nestled in
jagged mountains. Painted blue skies and
puffy white clouds. Cookie cutter
house on streets of deja vu.
Never have I danced as I did
then, my knives all flashing, my hair all streaming,
my mother red with laughter, my father shouting,
half human, half estranged. Ambiguity
raping every thing that moved.
The world at last a meadow,
the three of us whirling and singing, the three of us
screaming and falling, as if we were dying.
As if we could never stop--in 2009--
in my disheveled kitchen, beautiful filthy kitchen,
five thousand miles away
from the others dancing--in Iraq and Somalia--
oh God of mercy, oh wild God.
"The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible." — Einstein




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Well done a million times over.

This is one of the most powerful poems I have ever read. You used enjambment perfectly, it all flowed right.

Do not change a thing. That is an order. Change it and ruin it. It really is that simple.

PM for anything.

~Retro Disco666
'I have loved to the point of madness, which for me is the only true way to love'
~Francoise Sagan




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Thanks retro! I won't change a thing.
"The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible." — Einstein




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hello i am here to review!
it was a wonderful combination of cooking and dancing. i think you need to high light the characters personality more. as in you have said that there was a feeling of deja vu and i understand why you meant to write that but if you have had that feeling in the past you need to make it more living and the dance will come to life.




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Hello there :)

I have never said this before but this was a very colourful poem! As I read this, the general flow of your words created a form of dance in my head and it was swaying around in slow motion. It's also quite thought provoking. I love poems that make me think for a second. It's definitely something I have not seen in quite a while.

Good job ;)
The best is what you make it!

...eh, need a review? Click me!




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Literally couldn't find one thing wrong with this. A beautiful, well written piece of work. It's very refreshing to read something like this...you've definitely made a lasting impression on me!



Poetry and prayer are very similar.
— Carol Ann Duffy