I watch you walk hand in hand.
Im left wondering,
will I ever be your man.
I cannot help but think,
that you avoid my smile; my eyes.
That something, along the line,
inside you died.
Was it hope, maybe love?
No more viewing us as a gift from above?
At one point, you thought,
A smile is worth sharing, and hope is the start.
I guess it's naivety that keeps me going,
I guess it's hope that allows me to keep smiling.
Hope in you, hope in God, hope in us.
Two months later, nothing's changed
unless you count the tsunami of pain that came
rising in my heart and flooding my dreams,
landscapes erased, lives changed.
Are you worth it I ask?
Am I up to the task,
of playing this waiting game?
You truly are beautiful,
why can't you see?
You amaze me!
Why can't there be a we?
Is it pitiful to keep chasing you?
IS it sad that I won't give up on you?
Well maybe, but if i give up, I'd die,
If I quit, I would cry.
You may be content living that way,
but I'll keep waiting for "that one day",
When you awake and see me waiting
Arms outstretched, eyes wet.
Truly I feel sad that you can't see what I do,
Always adjusting your looks, for who?
I think you're absolutely divine,
Quit fidgeting, you're hair's fine.
Finally, almost three years later,
my words sink in,
You let go of his hand and move on,
He was only tearing you down.
You look my way and finally see,
what I have for years.
You reach up to the mirror,
and finally dry our tears.
(Do you know who the narrator is?)
I found very little grammatical errors, but the one I saw annoyed me greatly. Please, PLEASE, capitalize your I's; a lower case "i" draws the eye away from the other words, which are very well written. It just seems such a shame that a small thing like that would ruin a piece this good.The imagery was great and had deep descriptions to really show us the emotions involved. Overall, a strong poem and I find myself wanting to read future works by you. ^^
