Hear O Hear My Un-blissful Whispers

Gender

Points 9616

Reviews 263

Sat Jul 02, 2011 12:11 pm

Caerulean says... · Sat Jul 02, 2011 12:11 pm

Hear O Hear My Un-blissful Whispers

Will anyone understand
this ‘problem’ that I have?
It’s really annoying,
so exasperating,
and very frustrating
to be experiencing this
for this long
already.

Can anyone just know
the reasons why I have
this seemingly endless problem?
I just don’t know why
some birds cannot fly,
some wait till they die,
some people must lie.
Maybe, the reasons
are as sophisticated
or complicated
as theirs.

Is anyone capable
of telling me why
until now, I can’t be
inspired and keep writing?
This feeling just comes
and goes like it does
not care about me
at all.

Now, acceptable or not,
I’ll use this cliché—
Inspiration just goes
popping up like a bubble
and leaves you in a rubble
of distress and unable
to go writing
again.

Last edited by Caerulean on Thu Jul 28, 2011 4:55 pm, edited 2 times in total.

“(...) and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” - Gandalf, The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring

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Shakyll

Gender

Points 1089

Reviews 37

Sat Jul 02, 2011 2:29 pm

Shakyll says... · Sat Jul 02, 2011 2:29 pm

Is this about writers' block? It's really good. I love the lines "I just don’t know why
some birds cannot fly,
some wait till they die,
some people must lie."
Really excellent.

--Shackled

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TwistedMuffins

Gender

Points 5497

Reviews 117

Sat Jul 02, 2011 2:41 pm

TwistedMuffins says... · Sat Jul 02, 2011 2:41 pm

Hey there!

Writers' block, eh? A serious pain!
Anyways, the poem was amazing, though this part:

"It’s really annoying.It’s so exasperating.And it’s so frustrating...."
I'm not sure what it is (I think its "it's") but something here seems repetitive. Try something like, "It's really annoying, And very frustrating. Exasperating, nevertheless,..." or something like that. Try getting rid of the "it's".

"I just don’t know why, some birds cannot fly,some wait till they die,some people must lie." <- amazing line!

Overall, this was amazing, really.
Well done!

I would love to here more from you, once your writers' block's gone. Until then, get some fresh air, and go to some quiet area; it helps me anyways.

-Justtrying.

If I were to have a super power, it would be to time-travel, so that I could turn back time, and erase your very existence.

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