New Glory

Throughout the years
of strife and war,
Old Glory flew,
with never a quaver

She saw generals
barking orders,
But still she flew,
with never a waver

Through the nightmares
of millions of soldiers,
Still she stood,
with never a falter

As the new dawn
of her nation shone,
Still she stood,
as strong as ever

The old nation is no more;
we've dawned a new era
But through the early morning mists,
we see a New Glory

Spoiler

THANK YOU to our military!! Past, present, and future!

I have never been a patriotic person, but this poem made me want to be. You had good immigry with very few words. I don't see anything that really needs editing.

I'm just curious, what is the new glory (if it's baced on real life)?

And one more comment. I don't know if you were trying for this, but New/Old Glory seemed really sad. I can't say why but it felt like she was watching over with a tear running down her cheek.

Over all, really good! Keep writing!

--Bee--

Wow, this was really good. I really liked the emotion and the message you so clearly conveyed through you poetry

Throughout the years
of strife and war,
Old Glory flew,
with never a quaver

She saw countless
generals barking orders, [These two lines just seem a little choppy. Maybe you could try to make it flow a little smoother? It's not exactly the line itself, more the way it is broken up.]
But still she flew,
with never a waver

Through the nightmares
of millions of countless soldiers, [Saying 'millions of countless' seems a little redundant to me. It's almost the same thing. I think you need either 'millions' or 'countless', not both.]
Still she stood,
with never a falter

And as the new dawn [I generally dislike it when a sentence is started with 'And'. I don't really think it is needed.]
of her nation shone,
Still she stood,
as strong as ever

The old nation is no more;
we've dawned a new era
But through the early morning mists,
we see a New Glory [This is a good ending. It finishes it off quite nicely. ]

You did a really great job on this piece of poetry! It really makes the patriot in everyone come out, lol Anyway, this was well written. Keep it up!
~Tayla

hmm...i love it. But I do agree with Tayla, about the line of generals barking orders. Might want to edit a little. But I love it!!! America definitely deserves our poems.

Thanks, all! =D

I'm just curious, what is the new glory? I don't know if you were trying for this, but New/Old Glory seemed really sad. I can't say why but it felt like she was watching over with a tear running down her cheek.

Good question! I'm glad you asked that, Purple =) You may or may not know, but Old Glory is the American Flag. So basically, it's saying that we're a new nation, with a New Glory. (She has come a long way!) I guess she kind of is. Partly because of the state of the nation, I think.

Tayla- I'll fix those =) Thanks for pointing them out! ^_^

Thanks, Shakyll =) She definitely does!

Okay, edits made! ^_^