Im not sure where this came from me.

pain, so sharp
why wont it go away
dissapointmet in their eyes
i dont want it to stay,
the urge to run
as far as i can get
maybe i will leave this world
and wakeup, to be dead

Okay here it is- This piece was good. I liked the idea behind it. Could relate well, which is why I take such a liking to it.

The emotion in this piece though is pretty flat. You can't feel what the person is feeling. "Show" us...don't "tell" us.
A few things:

writingaway wrote:pain, so sharp

What pain? What's causing it? Describe it. Describe how the person feels about it. Do they scream or writhe in it? This is where you get the emotions of this piece across. "Show" us here...

writingaway wrote:dissapointmet in their eyes

Who's eyes? Tell us more about this. Mom's eyes? Dad's eyes? Sibling's eyes? Friend's eyes? Get into it more. Also explain why this person is disappointing them. It would make the piece much more deep. (You also spell disappointing wrong.)

The rest of this- do the same. Not for every line. Then you'll over do it. Just remember to insert how this person is feeling, what they're thinking. Deepen this piece and people, whether truly or not, will be able to relate and feel like they are feeling what this person is

Also...capitalize, capitalize, capitalize!

Great idea and structure so far,
-Brie♥

Hello, I'm Jojo and I shall be your reviewer for today1
Grammar is in red.
Others are in blue.

writingaway wrote:Pain, so sharp;(semicolon)
Why won't it go away? ( punctuation..)
dissapointmet Disappointment in their eyes
I don't want it to stay.( period)
The urge to run
as far as I can. get
Maybe I will leave this world
and wake up, to be dead.(period)

After edits and stuff...

Pain, so sharp;
Why won't it go away?
Disappointment in their eyes,
I don't want it to stay.
The urge to run
as far as I can,
Maybe I will leave this world
and wake up dead.

Overall:
This poem has a lot of grammatical and punctuational errors, to be truthful. It was sort of distracting, so the actual message was hard to understand.
Poems like these are nice, if executed carefully, but I'm afraid that this was too general and didn't give the reader any detail as to *who* you were talking about or *why* you felt this way.
I suggest that you make it longer, add the needed detail in order to give this poem an identity, and try to check for obvious grammar/punctuation mistakes before submitting stuff.

Other than that, nice job!

Keep Writing!
------------------
-Jojo

Thankyou for your feedback, however when I write a poem i don't notice or care in this matter if i make a grammer error and such. I don't like to go back and redo it for a reason, i like poems that arn't perfect. Thanks anyway.

Great job! There was something in this I found captivating. The critique: The other reviewers were correct in that it would be a lot stronger if it were less general. The poetic form wasn't perfect (the line "the urge to run" was short and disrupted the flow a lot), but since it sounds like you don't aim for cookie-cutter poems, there isn't much reason to stress out about poetic form. All that said, the gut-wrenching emotions you expressed grabbed me. It made me curious, wanting to read further, which is one of the first marks of something good. Adding a little more texture (e.g. "pain, so sharp"--where was the pain felt? In the speaker's chest? Stomach?) will improve this too. Seriously though, good job.