So Bradford Wrote

This is an acrostic poem I had to write for English class...enjoy!

T-Thanksgiving's history started on a boat.
H-History of pilgrims, so Bradford wrote.
A-A trial at sea, a calamity on land,
N-Nearly all died, was this really God's plan?
K-Knocking on deaths door, nearly all gave up hope.
S-Still they had their dreams, so Bradford wrote.
G-Grateful were they when came Virginia Dare,
I-Indians arrived, God answered their prayers.
V-Valleys to villages, forests to towns,
I-In all Bradford's trials he turned the world around.
N-Now God was their provider, sickness's antidote.
G-Good and bad He never left, so Bradford wrote.

I've always loved acrostics even though they're looked down on by the majority of the literary world This poem isn't particularly earth-shaking, but I don't think it was meant to be so I can't fault you there. I liked a lot of your wordings and word choices. That said, the first line is far too obvious and bland. Try rewriting it with a more creative voice. Maybe use some imagery to set the scene? I also thought line 8 was particularly bland. The reader wants to be shown, not told. Fix those two lines and you'll have a surprisingly well done poem (and maybe earn acrostics a little more respect)

So, when I read, "This is an acrostic poem" I kind of went to hit the return button. After actually looking at it though, I was Amazed (I wish I could find a better word then amazed because amazed simply doesn't begin to express what I thought)! As NightShade said, if more people wrote acrostics like this they would definitely earn more respect. Not really a review I know but I just thought it was awesome! Sorry

BeckFletch. xx

Nice! I agree with Nightshade in that Acrostics are cool, and yours shows potential, yet right now in it's unedited form it's rather bland. You used "So bradford wrote" twice, which, no matter how nice the line, is either redundant or an attempt to create some type dramatic conclusion. Also, even though it might be tempting, don't try to write it as a news story. Please. Show some originality, ditch the cliches, throw in some imagery for good measure and you've got it. Just don't report news that happened nearly four hundred years ago. Even that'd go under the no-no's of journalism (timeliness, anyone?). I like the idea a lot, but it still needs work in being a work of art, not an assignment. Cheers!
-Ligea

I love acrostics, and this one is no exception. It wasn't anything that'll change my life forever, buuut I don't think it was meant to be. It was meant to tell a story, and to just be short and nice. Wonderful job!