Blood River

Erm... am I missing something? Did you delete something? Was this a joke or what? I mean... you are a great writer and just... what?!

LOL! I just got back from being AWOL and came here from a critique on one of my stories...But that has to be the most amusing thing I've read for a long time!

this piece was funny! I enjoyed reading it. It was short and random, just the kind of thing that puts a smile on someone's face, or a laugh bursting to erupt out of their chest. The way you did the dialogue, it was like I was reading an Instant Message, it made it kind of enjoyable to me

I liked it though, it was funny. You based it off of Twilight, as I saw. When I saw "Edward" and the "werewolf" it made me smile, because it was so random. Although, it kind of made werewolves seem really violent, as Jacob is opposite, but I loved it!

Randomness is the best policy =P

i was a little confused at the beginning. are there people talking about the movie, or if not, i am confused at the random outbursts in the scene. the story is a little short for a chapter or a prologue/epilogue. i am not clear on what is happening in the story. please elaborate and i will reread.

Wow...this is the best story I have EVER read. xD! But now time for me to review it semi-seriously.

The assassin crouched in a field where the moon was bright and wolves cried in the distance.

Who's the assassin? Might wanna give us more detail on that, haha. You sound like you're starting a novel or something, but then it gets a little crazy.

Then a hot guy walked by and he was like, "OMG! Can I have ur #?" and he was like "Sure."

I wouldn't use the text talk if I were you...maybe have the hot guy say, "OhmiGod! Can I have your number?!" Oh, and don't put dialogue of different characters in the same paragraph! lol.

And then the wolf tore apart his flesh, and the blood spilled across the grass and Edward from Twilight came out and drank it all up. The end.

Tore apart whose flesh? The hot guy's? Or the assassin's? Haha. I love the ending! Other than the weird and most likely purposeful mistakes I saw, fantastic work on this weird story of yours xD!