I'm back, Two poems I wrote while ill.

I've not wrote for a few months, I had block. Situation: I was bored out of my mind yesterday with the Gastric flu so I decided to write some poetry. Nothing personal, just some brainstorming resulted in what you see below. Not my best work, but I'd be happy with suggestions. Punctuation is crap I know.


NO TITLE.

White chrome, drowning in red
My blood, only mine.
I fell
I hit my head
All my fault
I pray he won't do this again
I hope my scars heal
A copper key scratches in the lock
What a homecoming..?




DOLL

My child
Opaque skin, faultless, a doll.
All mothers say this.
Your sleeping so soundly
Since that October afternoon, I've had insomnia, I've wandered streets, back to that place.
I scour for memories, details I've forgotten
But I've forgotten nothing.
Caressing your hair, dark as pitch.
Lifting a lock I expose the mark.
When my life ended.
The only mark on you
They said you were thrown clear
Kissing you softly I say good night
I leave you in your coffin
Sleeping forever more.

I liked them both. I wasn't sure about the ...? at the end of the first poem, though, it confused me a little. Also, the long line in the second poem looks out of place, those things niggle at me, but when I read it, it sounds right, like it should be one long line. Anyway, nice work.

Thanks Matt.