I'm Not a Fool for You

I like this. However, this is poetry, and I do belive it belongs in that category.

However, I have one little issue:

If it's love your looking for
It's love you've given away
If it's time your looking for

This is the only repettive section of your poem and I dont feel like the repetitiveness does it any good.

Besides that I love it!

Keep writing!

Kay

Hi! Mostly punctuation here. Good poem...a little hard to understand. (I'm being all Philistine at the moment. Don't worry.) I will be brief because there's not really much to edit.

There's a word I'm searching for,
to tell you how I feel
Cocky or conceited?
A girl behind a veil
I can see past it
Straight into your eyes
They're cold and heartless
I can't see your disguise


But when you fall apart,
You'll find a way to catch yourself.
That boy had reason,
you've only ever loved yourself.
If it's love you're looking for
It's love you've given away
If it's time you're looking for
Then it's the price you pay

Hmm, interesting. I particularly like

A girl behind a veil
I can see past it
Straight into your eyes
They're cold and heartless

possibly because I understand it the best. But why are you talking to this girl and what's the back story?

Sorry if this is kind of laconic. As I said, there's not that much to change. Also, my brain is sleepy from a day on the computer. I'll come back when I'm bright and perky again.

Mrs.E.D.