Zee Poetic Side Of Life

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Zee Poetic Side Of Life

Ink encased fingers.
Balding slowly don’t tug hair,
5-7-5, death--

warmed over,
But don’t you fret, your life
Isn’t over yet.

There’s other forms,
Of written suicide that
You don’t really know.

But just you wait and
That pesky teacher will do
her mumbo-jumbo

And soon you will be
Just like some of us, informed
And a ticking bomb.

Tick. Tock.

-------BOOM.
Spoiler
-/- This should not be confused for a serious poem, it's just something I wrote during a moment of frustration.
Dont tell me the moon is shining, show me the glint of light on broken glass.

Anton Chekov




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Tell me about it. Poetry can be pretty cruel. Especially sonnets. This is a great, fun poem and really can relate to what others feel. I Look forward to seeing new works of yours! Keep writing!

-JC
"Imagination is more important than knowledge" -Albert Einstien




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Points 7340
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Hey anger. ;)

How are you? Hows the wii fit going? *Laughs*

Sorry that this review has to be short, I have about 2 milliminutes left on the laptop so Ill have to be short and sweet.
I won't correct grammar as I didn't think you were too bad in that section. You must use the beloved spell check.

Your structre was clear and easy to read, very enjoyable. It wasn't confusing and it was simple to know where you were rthyming your words.

The plot in general was ingenius. Poetry is tough. The only half decent poem I wrote was
Inspiration where'd you go?
And that wasn't skilled at all.

Your title was catchy and quirky. It will defiantly attract readers to review for you. I like the 'Zee' thing you have going. Its preety slick.

Zee time for me to go is drawing near. I must apologise for this awful review. Trust me, they aren't all this bad.
I have about 5 seconds left until my laptop shuts down and explodes. I must leave.

BE PROUD OF THIS! Its good. Verry good.
Zis reviewer must be gone.
Keep writing kaka xo
Got YWS?

If, when you mean to type yes you type yws, you know you belong. :P




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Points 5447
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Hi!

This was definitely pretty cool. I love the way it flows. I can feel the frustration in your structure and word choice. It was kind of jilted, in good way. It kind of felt as if your words were stomping about and slamming doors, if that makes any sense...If you ever decided to expand on it a bit it could definitely be "confused with serious poetry." :P If you did decide to expand, I would advise expanding on the idea of written suicide. I loved that part.

This was...not much of a review. I hope it was somewhat helpful

-Lette
Everyone's favorite life coach.
♪♥♫◦°°◦Lette◦°°◦♫♥♪


My blog: http://empressofsnark.blogspot.com/



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