Love Story chapter 2: Dancing in the Dark

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Love Story part 2! Please read the 1st chapter, to understand a little more. Please enjoy.
And here is the link to the club-----> page.php?id=905

-Amber's POV-

I stood in my bathroom, staring at the myself in the full length mirror.
I sighed in defeat. I would never be happy with my looks. Even though I waxed my eyebrows just for tonight.
The horrible things Becca makes me do.
My long, dark brown hair was pulled up by a headband, and I wore a strapless green dress with black polka dots.
All the color faded to white at the bottom of the dress, which ended at my knee.
I brought up my red hair curler to my face and perfected the only beautiful thing I have, my hair.

Love Story
Chapter 2: Dancing in the Dark

autumn background.jpg
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I finished applying make-up, when I heard the doorbell ring.
I quickly got downstairs, where I smelled Hellena's freshly-baked treats. The large chandeliers brightened the rooms, paintings hung on the walls, complimenting the golden walls. I opened the door.
Seven of my dear friends filled the hallway.

First Bridgette and her husband, Shane, greeted me. We talked about Shane's career, until I had to open the door for the other guests. Bridgette is stuck up, 25 year old actress, who always gets what she wants because of her rich mother. She was the snobby, blond cheerleader in high school. If you think guys go gaga for Becca...well you don't know the half of it! All the football players ADORED her. I can say this, since she's my friend. But those words have never escaped my lips. I wouldn't dare. But Shane is the complete opposite...kinda.
Shane is 29 and a rock star. He was an attractive rebel, with his guitar always in hand, long, blond hair, and black boots.

Bridgette wasn't as bad after we became friends.
You see, when I was a junior, in high school, I couldn't decide who I was, and what I was meant to do.
When people started to notice my artistic abilities, as a sophomore, they wanted to be my friends.
Bridgette leaned toward me and whispered in my ear.
"I saw you and Ryan on TMZ today." she said, innocently biting her lip. I shrugged off her comment an d walked away.
Ugh! That spoiled twit! She reported it to TMZ, and I know it!

Becca and my two other close friends, Sophie and Tessa, came in. I tried to shake off my anger to greet them.
Sophie had raven black hair that came up to her shoulder. Her hair was always in a tight ponytail. She wore rectangular glasses and she always had her sharp, pointed nose in a book. She goes to UCL to study architect.
Tessa had long, dirty blond hair, she was very tall and always dressed professionally. She was studying to be a lawyer.

Two of my best guy friend immediately rushed to Hellena for food.
Nice...

When I opened the door a few minutes later, at least 30 people came in.
Two men and one women immediately walked to my fathers office. Before I could call after them not to go in, he allowed them in. Daddy was always throwing parties, but never actually attending them.
In the corner of of my eyes, I noticed Abbi, in a sateen, bright yellow dress.

Abbi was Ryan's girlfriend. He proposed engagement four days before his death. She stared into the fireplace, watching the flames crackle. She is only 19, just starting college as an artist.
Ryan was 27, quite an age difference.
I tapped her shoulder.
She turned around and looked at me.

Her face was filled with pain, but she still gave me a fake smile.
"Amber." she said, her deep blue eyes seemed tired of all the crying.
"Your hair looks wonderful." I said. And for once in two weeks, she gave me a weak laugh.
One thing I forgot to mention. Abbi has bright pink stripes in her raven black hair.
I have always admired her hair, since the day Ryan introduced her to us.
"Did you see Aaron." she asked. She pointed behind me.
2 yards away, my little brother was trying to flirt with Kim Kardashian.
"So cute!" we laughed,together. Aaron is only a year younger than Abbi. Senior year is always the best.

Suddenly, I felt like I was struck by lighting.

"Will you dance with me?"

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! I thought. I looked over at Becca from across the room. She was in her tight blue dress, she was holding a virgin apple martini, the expression on her face said it all:
What are you doing Amber?!?! Say yes, idiot!

I turned my head toward the most handsome man I have ever seen.
Standing only a few inches away, Derek James held out his hand.
I felt my heart skip a beat.

"Um, I-I'm s-sorry. Do I know y-you?" I stuttered.
Becca through her hands over her head, her mouth was open, and her newly waxed eyebrows where furrowed.

"Absolutely not." he answered. His alluring voice seemed to carry throughout the room, even though he spoke slow, clear, and soft. Now I could smell his intoxicating cologne, his tall figure nearly leaned over me

I took his hand and he lead me toward the dim light.

I would have to remember to yell at Hellena for trying to...what is it that she said? Oh, yes! She wanted to "set the mood."
Ugh.
Dereks looked even more mysterious with the little light I had to see.
Oh, crap!
I can't see my feet! How am I supposed to do anything, as well as stand without light?!?!


I sneaked a panicked look to Becca.
I saw her run toward the kitchen. The light became bearable.
I love you, Becca! Now that I could see his face, I noticed him smiling at me, as if he was hiding a secret.
Jeez, I wish I knew what he was thinking.

He slipped his hand around my waist, pulling me closer to him.
I placed my hand on his broad shoulder.
He gave me a smile that sent chills down my back. We swayed to the classical music.
He leaned towards me until I felt his lips slightly caress my neck, when I heard him whisper,

"Do you like to dance?"

All of a sudden, Michael Buble's, Save the Last Dance for Me, came on the stereo.
Panic hit me.

We started dancing to a series of hard footwork.
Everything's okay Amber, you know how to dance, this will be a breeze.
He was literally sweeping me off my feet, I couldn't think. All I knew was that I was dancing in the arms of the hottest
man on Earth and that his cocky smile was incredible.
I melted into the music. All I knew was that I was probably making Kim Kardashian embarrassed by how much I was moving my booty.
All I heard was our laughter and the beat.
It seemed like hours went by when the song ended.

"Would you like to get some fresh air?" he asked, sincerely. He had probably noticed my panting.
"Sure!" I said, giggling like a stupid school-girl.
We walked out to the deck outside.

He opened the door for me as we stepped into the chill air.
We sat at a bench that my birth mother and father always sat in, overlooking the three of us play in the humongous backyard. And right above us what the balcony of my bedroom. From up there I could see my fathers greenhouse, the big pool, a basketball hoop, a tire swing and seven big willow trees.

The only light you could see outside was the moonlight.

I despised dim lighting.
That is why whenever I go to a dimly lit restaurant I have to fight to not fall asleep.
If I was having the most engaging conversation with the Queen of England, I would still fall asleep.
But how could I possibly fall asleep with the most handsome man in California, possibly in the world!

I leaned over toward the table next to the bench we sat in.
On top of the table was a box of matches and a candle that smelled like lavender, to remind me of my mother, Lily.
I remember,
I was nine years old, Ryan was twelve and Aaron was only two years old.
It was a cold winters morning. Mom was in warm kitchen, the fireplace was lit up.
Mom carried Aaron in one hand and held a whisk in the other. An angelic voice escaped her lips as she sang and swirled him around as blueberry pancakes cooked on a pan. You could here their joyful laughter through the wide window.
Outside, I sat on a branch on one of the willow trees. Ryan threw the ends of a thick rope up to me. I tied a tight knot around the branch. Daddy secured a big tire to the rope. He tested it by pushing it.
With my luck, my foot was wrapped around the rope. I fell forward.
I felt Ryans warm arms catch me before I touched the ground. I started crying. The fist thing I saw when I opened my tear stained eyes, was the panicked look on my mothers beautiful face as she ran outside, wearing sweats and Daddy's Dodgers T-shirt. . She took me from Ryans hands, she kissed my cheek and all the stress went away.


I lit up the candle, and became more relaxed, but of course, I couldn't be relaxed for long.

Derek extended his hand and placed it on the back of the bench, nearly touching my back.
"Is it too late for introductions?" he asked.
"I'm Amber, Martin Fox's daughter. I'm 25 years old and I am starting my last year at UCLA in two weeks."
"That's great, what are you studying for?" he asked.
"Um, I'm studying journalism, just in case acting doesn't work out. But I have been in a few movies."

"Yeah, weren't you in a movie recently with Gerard Butler?"
"Yep!" I replied. "So what about you?"

His smiled still seemed to be holding something behind it.
"I'm Derek James." he smiled. "I am 31 and I am a producer at CNN."
That's why Dad doesn't like him! Cause hes paparazzi!
Ugh! I hope little blue smurfs eat crackers in his bed or something!

"I don't particularly care for paparazzi." he said, as if reading my mind.
I laughed dryly. "I watch TMZ nearly everyday!" I rotated my crossed legs when I realized that blood wasn't circulating in my legs.
"Do you see yourself there a lot?"
"From time to time." I said. "By friend said that she saw me today, when they were talking about my brother." a false smile was still plastered on my face.

Derek raised an eyebrow, staying as cool as I was trying to be.
"Do you have any emotions at all?"
"What?" I said, shocked. "I'm overly-dramatic! Of course I have emotions!"

"Then why don't you act like your upset over your brother?" he asked, calmly.
"Because I can't."
"And why not?"

I stared at him for a moment longer until I replied.
"Because since I was nineteen when I had to fix everything when my mother died. I had to pick everybody up and there was no room for my complaints, as well as crying. So..."
Derek interrupted me. I noticed that now we where leaning toward each other and much closer that when we originally sat down.

"Amber,"I love the was my name sounds coming out of his lips, warm, soft lips...
"Your mother and closest brother were murdered! You have a right to cry." he simply stated.
I stuttered. "I'm sorry. If you want me to cry its not gonna happen."

He chuckled.
"I don't want you to cry. I'm just saying that crying isn't a sign of weakness. Its a sign of being human."
I sighed. I looked up to the starry sky. I have never seen the stars this clear. I was usually not this visable due to pollution.
The sky seemed magical.


Derek's POV:

She looked up to the night sky. She moved a little closer to me.
"What are you thinking about." she looked at me. Her smile was amazing.
Her beauty in the moonlight overthrew me.

"The stars remind me of the UK." she said. "My mother wanted to live there. So when I was fourteen, we moved there.
But I never liked it. I didn't like the rainy weather." she looked back up to the sky.
She lightly placed her head on my arm. After a few moments, I figured that she was asleep.
I slid my arm around her waist and pulled her closer to me. Her head rested on my shoulder as she gently slept.

I realized that I couldn't let her sleep in my arms forever.

I took her in my arms. I looked up to the balcony above us.
I walked up to the honeysuckle covered columns. I climbed up the column and stepped into the balcony.
I wiggled the doorknob.
It was open.

I walked into a magnificent bedroom.
The furniture was white, the accessories where blue.
The first thing I noticed was the white grand piano.
On the other side of the room, was a canopy bed.

I layed her on the bed. I removed her tall black high heels. I will never understand how women could handle so much pain in their feet. I took off her headband and pulled the covers over her fragile body.

As I closed the balcony doors behind me, I took a glance at her beauty.
I chuckled as I leaped off the balcony.

Yay! Chapter two is done!
Last edited by lovethelifeulive on Sat Jan 08, 2011 5:20 pm, edited 21 times in total.
If you prick us, shall we not bleed?
If you tickle us, shall we not laugh?
If you poison us, shall we not die?
If you wrong us, shall we not revenge?
The Merchants of Venice-Shakespear
Love the life u live,
and live the life u love




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Alright, so, thank you for putting this into a readable font.
Now, what I have to say is that your character seems a tad mary-sue ish.
How does she know Kim Kardashian? oh, because I think you said her dad's a movie director in the first chapter. She sort of seems like the sort of person that never has something bad happen-flawless.

Other then that, you need to explain way more.
Character thoughts, character emotions, and character descriptions. You don't have enough of that.

~WickedWonder
'We will never believe again, kick drum beating in my chest again, oh, we will never believe in anything again, preach electric to a microphone stand.'

*Formerly wickedwonder*




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what are you don't amber?

i presume that's supposed to be what are you doing? you might want to change that.




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omygod this is awesome
I have no idea what to put so I am writing random things. There. That should be enough.




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Ok, so I would like to start out by saying I absoulutley love this story. You are a fantastic writer, and your story is perfect. You make everything sound so much more mature, so the people actually act the way they are in age.
I am never able to do that, so I think that that is a fantastic skill.
You are a very talented writer, and the story that you are writing is fabulous. So I am supposed to be Becca right? Cause wow, may i say a few things.
I love how you make me seem like a snotty stuck up kind of person, yet you incorporate the sweetness that I am in real life into the character. The person who is obviously you is perfect, it goes along with your real aspect of life very nicely. I can totally imagine you saying those things and doing them, and the same with my character. i am guessing this derek person is Matt? Just a guess, correct me if I am wrong.
So once again, good job on your writing, and keep writing.
I would love to see more drama and action in the story, and a lot more of you for how you act in real life :D
Your friend here, there, and everywhere,
CassidyRose
I have no idea what to put so I am writing random things. There. That should be enough.




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Points 1274
Reviews 29
lovethelifeulive wrote:Love Story part 2! Please read the 1st chapter, to understand a little more. Please enjoy.
And here is the link to the club-----> page.php?id=905

-Amber's POV-

I stood in my bathroom, staring at the myself in the full length mirror.
I sighed in defeat. I would never be happy with my looks.no you wouldn't Even though I waxed my eyebrows just for tonight.
The horrible things llike this Becca makes me do.
My long, dark brown hair was pulled up by a headband, and I wore a strapless green dress with black polka dots.you may want to put brands, and make them expensive
All the color faded to white at the bottom of the dress, which ended at my knee.
I brought up my red hair curler to my face and perfected the only beautiful thing I have,which is my hair.

Love Story
Chapter 2: Dancing in the Dark

autumn background.jpg


I finished applying make-up, when I heard the doorbell ring.
I quickly ran downstairs, where I smelled Hellena's freshly-baked treats. The large chandeliers brightened the rooms, paintings hung up, complimenting the golden walls. I opened the door.
Seven of my dear friends filled the hallway.

First Bridgette and her husband, Shane, greeted me. We talked about Shane's career, until I had to open the door for the other guests. Bridgette is stuck up, 25 year old actress, who always gets what she wants because of her rich mother. She was the snobby, blond cheerleader in high school. If you think guys go gaga for Becca...well you don't know the... you might want to take this out half of it! All the football players ADORED the all caps are unnecessary, might want to consider putting italics in instead her. I can say this, since she's my friend. But those words have never escaped my lips. I wouldn't dare. these 2 sentences do not make sense together But Shane is the complete opposite...kinda.
Shane is 29 and a rock star. He was an attractive rebel, with his guitar always in hand, long, blond hair, and black boots.

Bridgette wasn't as bad after we became friends.
You see, when I was a junior, in high school, I couldn't decide who I was, and what I was meant to do.
When people started to notice my artistic abilities, as a sophomore, they wanted to be my friends take this out.
Bridgette leaned toward me and whispered in my ear.
"I saw you and Ryan on TMZ today." she said, innocently biting her lip. I shrugged off her comment and walked away.
Ugh! That spoiled twit! She reported it to TMZ, and I know it!

Becca and my two other close friends, Sophie and Tessa, came in. I tried to shake off my anger to greet them.
Sophie had raven black hair that came up to her shoulder. Her hair was always in a tight ponytail. She wore rectangular glasses and she always had her sharp, pointed nose in a book. She goes to UCL , studying architect.
Tessa has long, dirty blond hair, she is very tall and always dressed professionally. She is studying to be a lawyer.
don't make your words seem like they are in the past
Two of my best guy friends immediately rushed to Hellena for food.
Nice...

When I opened the door a few minutes later, at least thirty people came in.
Two men and one women immediately walked to my fathers office. Before I could call after them not to go in, he allowed them in. Daddy is... again with the past tense always throwing parties, but never actually attending them.
In the corner of of my eyes, I noticed Abbi, in a sateen, bright yellow dress.

Abbi was Ryan's girlfriend. He proposed engagement four days before his death. She stared into the fireplace, watching the flames crackle. She is only 19, just starting college as an artist.
Ryan was 27, quite an age difference.
I tapped her shoulder.
She turned around and looked at me.

Her face was filled with pain, but she still gave me a fake smile.
"Amber." she said, her deep blue eyes seemed tired of all the crying.
"Your hair looks wonderful." I said. And for once in two weeks, she gave me a weak laugh.
One thing I forgot to mention. Abbi has bright pink stripes in her raven black hair.
I have always admired her hair, since the day Ryan introduced her to us.
"Did you see Aaron." she asked. She pointed behind me.
two yards away, my little brother was trying to flirt with Kim Kardashian.
"So cute!" we laughed,together. Aaron is only a year younger than Abbi. Senior year is always the best.

Suddenly, I felt like I was struck by lighting.

"Will you dance with me?"

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! I thought. I looked over at Becca from across the room. She was in her tight blue dress, she was... take these words out, then add a comma holding a virgin apple martini, the expression on her face saying it all:
What are you doing Amber?!?! Say yes, idiot!

I turned my head toward the most handsome man I have ever seen.
Standing only a few inches away, Derek James held out his hand.
I felt my heart skip a beat.

"Um, I-I'm s-sorry. Do I know y-you?" I stuttered.
Becca through her hands over her head, her mouth was open, and her newly waxed eyebrows where furrowed.

"Absolutely not." he answered. His alluring voice seemed to carry throughout the room, even though he spoke slow, clear, and soft. Now I could smell his intoxicating cologne, his tall figure nearly leaned over me

I took his hand and he lead me toward the dim light.

I would have to remember to yell at Hellena for trying to...what is it that she said? Oh, yes! She wanted to "set the mood."
Ugh.
Dereks looked even more mysterious with the little light I had to see.
Oh, crap!
I can't see my feet! How am I supposed to do anything, as well as stand without light?!?!


I sneaked a panicked look to Becca.
I saw her run toward the kitchen. The light became bearable.
I love you, Becca! Now that I could see his face, I noticed him smiling at me, as if he was hiding a secret.
Jeez, I wish I knew what he was thinking.

He slipped his hand around my waist, pulling me closer to him.
I placed my hand on his broad shoulder.
He gave me a smile that sent chills down my back. We swayed to the classical music.
He leaned towards me until I felt his lips slightly caress my neck, when I heard him whisper,

"Do you like to dance?"

All of a sudden, Michael Buble's, Save the Last Dance for Me, came on the stereo.
Panic hit me.

We started dancing to a series of hard footwork.
Everything's okay Amber, you know how to dance, this will be a breeze.
He was literally sweeping me off my feet, I couldn't think. All I knew was that I was dancing in the arms of the hottest
man on Earth and that his cocky smile was incredible.
I melted into the music. All I knew was that I was probably making Kim Kardashian embarrassed by how much I was moving my booty.
All I heard was our laughter and the beat.
It seemed like hours went by when the song ended.

"Would you like to get some fresh air?" he asked, sincerely. He had probably noticed my panting.
"Sure!" I said, giggling like a stupid school-girl.
We walked out to the deck outside.

He opened the door for me as we stepped into the chill air.
We sat at a bench that my birth mother and father always sat in, overlooking the three of us play in the humongous backyard. And right above us what the balcony of my bedroom. From up there I could see my fathers greenhouse, the big pool, a basketball hoop, a tire swing and seven big willow trees.

The only light you could see outside was the moonlight.

I despised dim lighting.
That is why whenever I go to a dimly lit restaurant I have to fight to not fall asleep.
If I was having the most engaging conversation with the Queen of England, I would still fall asleep.
But how could I possibly fall asleep with the most handsome man in California, possibly in the world!

I leaned over toward the table next to the bench we sat in.
On top of the table was a box of matches and a candle that smelled like lavender, to remind me of my mother, Lily.
I remember,
I was nine years old, Ryan was twelve and Aaron was only two years old.
It was a cold winters morning. Mom was in warm kitchen, the fireplace was lit up.
Mom carried Aaron in one hand and held a whisk in the other. An angelic voice escaped her lips as she sang and swirled him around as blueberry pancakes cooked on a pan. You could here their joyful laughter through the wide window.
Outside, I sat on a branch on one of the willow trees. Ryan threw the ends of a thick rope up to me. I tied a tight knot around the branch. Daddy secured a big tire to the rope. He tested it by pushing it.
With my luck, my foot was wrapped around the rope. I fell forward.
I felt Ryans warm arms catch me before I touched the ground. I started crying. The fist thing I saw when I opened my tear stained eyes, was the panicked look on my mothers beautiful face as she ran outside, wearing sweats and Daddy's Dodgers T-shirt. . She took me from Ryans hands, she kissed my cheek and all the stress went away.


I lit up the candle, and became more relaxed, but of course, I couldn't be relaxed for long.

Derek extended his hand and placed it on the back of the bench, nearly touching my back.
"Is it too late for introductions?" he asked.
"I'm Amber, Martin Fox's daughter. I'm 25 years old and I am starting my last year at UCLA in two weeks."
"That's great, what are you studying for?" he asked.
"Um, I'm studying journalism, just in case acting doesn't work out. But I have been in a few movies."

"Yeah, weren't you in a movie recently with Gerard Butler?"
"Yep!" I replied. "So what about you?"

His smiled still seemed to be holding something behind it.
"I'm Derek James." he smiled. "I am 31 and I am a producer at CNN."
That's why Dad doesn't like him! Cause hes paparazzi!
Ugh! I hope little blue smurfs eat crackers in his bed or something!

"I don't particularly care for paparazzi." he said, as if reading my mind.
I laughed dryly. "I watch TMZ nearly everyday!" I rotated my crossed legs when I realized that blood wasn't circulating in my legs.
"Do you see yourself there a lot?"
"From time to time." I said. "By friend said that she saw me today, when they were talking about my brother." a false smile was still plastered on my face.

Derek raised an eyebrow, staying as cool as I was trying to be.
"Do you have any emotions at all?"
"What?" I said, shocked. "I'm overly-dramatic! Of course I have emotions!"

"Then why don't you act like your upset over your brother?" he asked, calmly.
"Because I can't."
"And why not?"

I stared at him for a moment longer until I replied.
"Because since I was nineteen when I had to fix everything when my mother died. I had to pick everybody up and there was no room for my complaints, as well as crying. So..."
Derek interrupted me. I noticed that now we where leaning toward each other and much closer that when we originally sat down.

"Amber,"I love the was my name sounds coming out of his lips, warm, soft lips...
"Your mother and closest brother were murdered! You have a right to cry." he simply stated.
I stuttered. "I'm sorry. If you want me to cry its not gonna happen."

He chuckled.
"I don't want you to cry. I'm just saying that crying isn't a sign of weakness. Its a sign of being human."
I sighed. I looked up to the starry sky. I have never seen the stars this clear. I was usually not this visable due to pollution.
The sky seemed magical.


Derek's POV:

She looked up to the night sky. She moved a little closer to me.
"What are you thinking about." she looked at me. Her smile was amazing.
Her beauty in the moonlight overthrew me.

"The stars remind me of the UK." she said. "My mother wanted to live there. So when I was fourteen, we moved there.
But I never liked it. I didn't like the rainy weather." she looked back up to the sky.
She lightly placed her head on my arm. After a few moments, I figured that she was asleep.
I slid my arm around her waist and pulled her closer to me. Her head rested on my shoulder as she gently slept.

I realized that I couldn't let her sleep in my arms forever.

I took her in my arms. I looked up to the balcony above us.
I walked up to the honeysuckle covered columns. I climbed up the column and stepped into the balcony.
I wiggled the doorknob.
It was open.

I walked into a magnificent bedroom.
The furniture was white, the accessories where blue.
The first thing I noticed was the white grand piano.
On the other side of the room, was a canopy bed.

I layed her on the bed. I removed her tall black high heels. I will never understand how women could handle so much pain in their feet. I took off her headband and pulled the covers over her fragile body.

As I closed the balcony doors behind me, I took a glance at her beauty.
I chuckled as I leaped off the balcony.

Yay! Chapter two is done!
I have no idea what to put so I am writing random things. There. That should be enough.



Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain.
— Joseph Campbell