Life

Swirling wind,
Chirping birds,
Sounds indescribable for words,
Sitting lakes,
Rustling trees,
Sweeter honey made from bees,
Soft earth,
Light air,
More beautiful then a chestnut mare,
Golden water,
Fun guests,
More fragile then a birds nest,
God gives us many gifts
but the gift of life is best.

I really liked this, it was well-paced and easy to read.

You spelt 'indescribable' wrong in the third line.

However, I believe you should split the last line like so -

"God gives us many gifts
but the gift of life is best."

And it reads a lot better.

Good job.

Heh...well, I liked this...but not a lot. However, I must admit that your ability to rhyme and keep the rhythym going is really good--and I admire that, because Lord knows I can't do it,lol. But it was a pretty okay poem.

This is very interesting...the flow is very unique too. You use a lot of commas...I'm not sure if that's good or bad or what. This has potential...but it could use some work. A few drafts couldn't hurt in the slightest. Don't give up. Keep writing.

I loved this, it had its own way of flowing together, the one thing I would change is the part when it says "Fun guests" I just don't think it fit, it didn't flow with the rest of the poem. Great work!

I think the rhymes are beautiful and it gives such a powerful message. Though I feel that the flow was choppy and a bit random at some lines. Also, the third and fifth lines don't seem to fit very well with the meaning of the poem. Who exactly are the fun guests?

Good job.
it could use some better meaning