Letting Go

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I know there isn't much background stuff. I was focusing more on the raw emotion instead. Feel free to rip it to pieces. *bracing self*

...

“Blaise, you idiot!” I screamed, chucking a throw pillow at him. He easily dodged it, taking a small step to his right.

“Kat,” he said calmly to me. “I think you’re overreacting.”

“Overreacting?” I yelled. “Overreacting? You have not begun to see me overreact!” I hurled another pillow at him, which sailed over him as he ducked. It hit the wall with a soft thud.

“Do you not realize how stupid that was? You. Are. Such. A. Bonehead.” I grabbed at the couch for another pillow, but found I had already lobbed them all at Blaise. I settled for a cushion.

“Oh, so Alec tries to kill you and you keep your cool,” Blaise said. “But I save your life and you throw a tantrum. Am I the only one who sees the irony?”

“Blaise, you almost died!

“But I didn’t!” said Blaise, exasperated. “And better me than you,” he muttered. Unfortunately for him, I had good hearing.

“No,” I said. “Not better you. Never better you.”

Blaise’s probing blue eyes met mine, and I could feel tears start to build up. He stepped over the low, black coffee table to where I was standing by the couch. Since he was four inches taller than me, I had to tilt my head up to see his face.

“Kat, what do you mean by that?” he asked, his voice soft yet demanding.

“Don’t you get it?” I asked. A tear slid down my cheek. “I don’t want to live if you’re not here. You’ve been my best friend since forever. I can’t remember you ever not being here. If you left, I'd be alone.” More tears fell from my eyes, and I sat down on the couch, trying not to break down. I hugged my legs to my chest, and rested my head on my knees.

I had come so close to losing him. I had never been more terrified in my entire life.

"You'd still have your family," he said reassuringly.

"That's not the same, and you know it. You're my only real friend."

I could feel myself sink slightly, and knew Blaise must have sat down beside me. He put his hand on my back and rubbed in small circles, obviously trying to comfort me. He was so close I could smell his cologne.

My throat constricted, and my pulse quickened. What was wrong with me?

“Just your friend?” Blaise asked gently.

I looked up at him questioningly. His coal black hair hung in his face as always, partially hiding his midnight blue eyes.

Out of those same eyes I had seen nearly every emotion possible: joy, anger, sadness, fear, envy, satisfaction. But now they hosted a new emotion, something I couldn’t name. I had never seen it before.

Blaise’s hand slid to the small of my back, and I gulped. Not out of fear, but, though I wasn’t sure I was ready to admit it, pleasure.

His free hand cupped my chin, and tilted it upward. Then his mouth was on mine.

My brain may as well have died. The only thought I could string together was, ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh. I was getting dizzy and my vision started to blur; I realized I had forgotten how to breathe. But it was like riding a bike. In, out. In, out.

I couldn’t have told you how long we stayed like that. It might have been a few seconds, or it might have been hours. All I knew was that when Blaise pulled away, both of our breathe was ragged.

Did I like the kiss, did I want him to kiss me again? I had no clue. Was I inwardly freaking out on a major level? You know it.

Every one of my instincts were telling me to run, to flee, to get as far away from there as possible. But it was as though I was chained in place; I couldn’t move. I was frozen.

Blaise’s fierce stare made shivers run up and down my spine. In a good way.

Without a single word our lips were once again pressed together. My mind told me to push him away, that I was too confused, too unsure to be smart about this.

But by this point I was too emotionally drained to care. For the first time in years, I dropped my careful hold on life and gave in. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and turned my head to kiss him deeper, ignoring the warning my mind was blaring. I pressed against him and inwardly let go.

Sure, I would regret it in the morning, probably more than I had ever regretted anything. But right now it felt good, better than anything, ever.

And who knew, maybe there wouldn’t be a tomorrow. Then the moment would have been given up for nothing.
Last edited by ultraviolet on Mon Jul 05, 2010 2:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Blah blah blah. You feel trapped in your life. Here is what I am hearing: happiness isn't worth any inconvenience."

~asofterworld.com




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Hello there!

So for starters, I like the fact that I don't know what went on before hand. It gives the seen a little mystery which can be very good. I do think, however that I wasn't feeling the emotion you wanted me to feel. There weren't enough close and personal description for me to feel like I was in the moment rather than just reading about it.

I want to know more about what Kat maybe looks like. Give me more description on how Blaise is staring at Kat. Tell me how his eyes were looking at her. This story has the potential to be very emotion filled. I think it just needs a bit more work.

I am not very good at grammatical errors so I will let someone else deal with that! I hope I get to read more! Please PM if you ever re-write it because I would love to read it again!

-Gabbs
There is no secret left unspoken.




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Hey there!

I'll nitpick for a bit first, and I'm sorry if I seem too harsh! :D

My throat constricted, and my breathe short circuited, and my pulse quickened.

I'm sorry, but your breath --- or your breathing, for that matter --- cannot short circuit. Actually, none of your body parts can short circuit at all! Your breathing can come in gasps, or you can find it hard to breathe at all, but your breathing cannot short circuit. Just sayin'. ;D

You can express raw emotion pretty well! I like the fact that you didn't gave any background on the story --- it made me more interested in what was happening next. It's quite good, so I don't think anyone would rip it into pieces! ;D

All in all, an enthralling read! Keep up the good work! :D

-Rosie =]
you'll never find another sweet little girl with sequined sea foam eyes
ocean lapping voice, smile coy as the brightest quiet span of sky
and you're all alone again tonight; not again, not again, not again.
and don't it feel alright, and don't it feel so nice? lovely.






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This is awesome!! I loved it, there's only one thing that I saw was wrong...
Unfortunately for him, I had good hearing.
this seems a little awkward.
But other than that... IT WAS GREAT!
And of course no background info, but you already warned me about that so..

Alzora
My kitty avatar is my minion. She sneaks everywhere and always tells me whats going on.
*kitty avatar sneaks up and whispers in my ear*
Oh... She says it is time...
*grabs you and puts you in box*
Perfect!




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Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! That was a great story. I hate that you didnt give us any background info, but it makes the reader want to read on. I agree with Grabriella that if you edit this, please let me know. Good job and keep writing!

Sierra :mrgreen:
If you look deep enough you will see music; the heart of nature being everywhere music.
Thomas Carlyle

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.
Lao Tzu




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Well miss violet.
Kaka will be the critque of your writing today.

....
....
Speechless! Utterly speechless! You are only the same age as me and you can write like that!
Wow-your making me look bad! x
So I loved everything,it was all so well placed and the charchters were enjoyable and easy to relate to. I liked the start. The throwing pillows and settling for a cushion thing! ZING! My total favorite part! XX
I loved how courageous the guy was-just going and kissing her! Zing! (zING IS ME NEW WORD!! Teeeheee!)
Amazing work! I loved it-It captured my heart..
The only thing I didn't understand-It was bad I just couldn't get my head around it!- was that she might regret it tommorrow!?!
Why?! Kissing someone is enjoyable! Why would she regret it if it was her best guy friend,her was kissing her and she was kissing back!
Tell them straigh darlin!
Otherwise this was mindblowingly good,totally movie makable!
Kaka x
Got YWS?

If, when you mean to type yes you type yws, you know you belong. :P




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This is great. Nice, short and fast. i liked it. Enough description and dialouge. perfect. Keep writing!
Nike :)
"If I look like a monster,' he says roughly, 'then no one will be surprised when I do monstrous things." - A.B. Poranek




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i really liked it
i was grabbed by it so you are a great author i liked the vocabulary and dialog bits, great mix.
your really good.
(:




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This is really brilliant. You have an excellent flow of dialogue and a really nice, well thought out plot. I like the lack of background information, it leave a lot up to the reader to decide for themselves about the relationship between the characters.



It always seems impossible until it's done.
— Nelson Mandela