Wedding in a Park

Grass is in the service of love,
a downy bed to cradle our bodies
as we roll down the hill together,
laughing,
and cling to kiss:

The ritual of love-making.

When a cold dawn murders the stars,
the shadowed grass is still present:

Witness
to the marriage of our bodies.

This was an absolutely excellent piece- I love how you are able to convey so much imagery all at once. You are so concise- it's making me jealous

Wonderful imagery and emotions... great piece altogether. Wonderful use of language and word choice.

-Coral-

I agree with Persephoneia; great imagery. Wondered why it was sixteen, and I still wonder, for the way you present the poem is not explicit at all, it's beautiful. Great work.

I really like this poem. It has a strange mood, kind of calm but happy at the same time and reminds me of that feeling you get when you walk somewhere at night and everything's silent, but not in a creepy way.

Haha, thanks. I rated it sixteen because, well...it IS about sex, and I wasn't sure what they'd want that under, so I'm like, eh, 16 it is then. You know. Just to be on the safe side.

And you know, this just came from a prompt on another site: I had to include the words "grass," "service," "murder," "ritual," and "love" in the poem. (I was also supposed to only have ten syllables per line, but I forgot that part.) But it came out nicely.

That's really good! Your a very talented writer!