Love

Love

Tender and gentle,
Caressing my words to your ear,

It takes on a form of it’s own.

Filling me with swelling emotions,
A thriving heartbeat;

It shifts my thoughts to you only you.

Soft and warm,
Like a winter night spent in front of a fire,

It brightens the room of life.

We need it to survive
The lonely times.

It takes it’s loving arms, wrapping them around us.

The sharing of our worlds,
Us becoming one,

It’s called love.

Hey Rascalover!

The poem is really beautiful. I quite enjoyed it The words are well chosen and you describe really well what love is!

We need it to survive
The lonely times.

I'd put "In" instead of "The",

It shifts my thoughts to you only you.

and I would put a coma after the first "you"

The sharing of our worlds,
Us becoming one,

and you could also take out the "Us" in there

but that's just some things i would change, i find it flows better But we all got our different style and it's already beautiful as it is.

-Truth-

Caressing my words to your ear,

"Caressing" is misused. A caress is a gentle touch. You can gently touch something to another thing, but how do you gentle touching something to another thing? Rather than just rely on a thesaurus, make sure to check in a dictionary that your usage is correct. Some words, though the meanings are similar, are not the same, and so they are used differently.

One thing I noticed was that you described love as loving.

...

You described what you were describing as itself. That defeats the entire purpose of trying to describe that thing, which is love in this case.

One of poetry's greatest strengths is that it can be used to describe something without ever directly describing it. By describing love as "loving", you undermined that strength. When coupled with the lack of imagery (how soft is "soft" and warm, "warm", for instance), this poem essentially reads as rattling husk, empty of any meaning or purpose.

I suggest that you completely overhaul this poem, starting with the imagery. Try describing what you are trying to describe in ways you have never heard it described and with words that are more precise than "soft" or "warm" or "lonely". Instead, show your readers exactly how soft that softness is, and do not describe what you are trying to describe as itself. If you do a good enough job, you may find that you will never need to state what the poem is about directly; it will have become obvious through your imagery.

It will take a lot of drafts, and it can be quite frustrating, but when you finally come up with the perfectly unique sets of imagery for a poem, it is extremely satisfying. And I know you can come up with that perfectly unique imagery if you just keep trying at it. :D

I know what caressing means. I was trying to use it in a personification sort of way. I did not use a thesaurus. I really liked your review. thanks.

I know what caressing means. I was trying to use it in a personification sort of way. I did not use a thesaurus. I really liked your review. thanks.