Runaway Marriage - chapter 1, part 2
My parents took turns pacing across the living room. They could wear the carpet thin if they kept on doing that – which I'd told them – but they just shot me aggravated glances that shut me up. The carpet was the color of puke anyways – I didn't really care if we had to change it, but I tried to keep my mind busy, so that the horrible guilt wouldn't overpower me. I felt waves of pure fear breaking over me as I stood in front of my family, minus Natalie and the twins. The twins were upstairs, playing in their room. At least they didn't have to see the chaos that was going on down here. I could swear my hands were shaking.
"Normal seventeen year olds hang out at the mall, get a summer job…" my mom started again with a shaking voice. I shuddered in response, hanging my head low. I wanted to cry again. "They do not walk in – uninvited – and steal the groom from a wedding! Especially not the mayor's son!" She threw up her hands.
"Mom, listen to me –" I began, but was interrupted. Again. It was a stupid idea to call in a family meeting with my brothers. I've been trying to convey my message for the last freakin' hour. But no. Of course they wouldn't let me speak. What they had to say was just oh so more important than me defending myself. Ugh!
Jordan howled. "That's my baby sister!" he said through a victorious grin. He draped his arm across my shoulder, not noticing it when I flinched. "The mayor's son, Kido! You have some guts."
He kept that idiotic smile on his face and that made me feel a bit better. I loved my brother – even though he wasn't the sharpest pencil in the bunch sometimes.
He ruffled my dark hair like he'd been doing for the past hour. I mumbled something feeble that was meant to keep him from doing so, but he ignored. Finally, my head snapped up. "How about I mess up your hair, huh, Jay?" I used my most irritable voice.
Jordan raised both eyebrows. "Like you can."
Damn it, he was right. His golden hair was hidden under a baseball cap. It was so disgusting that he didn't even bother to change clothes after his team practice; he still reeked of his workout.
"Besides, baby sister, I'm on your side here." Jordan turned to the rest of the family. He stretched his whole five foot eleven so he seemed really tall. I knew that made him feel more self assured – a trick he taught me when I was scared to go to school in the first grade. He met Dad's eyes as he spoke. "We all knew Nat was miserable. Becky just had the guts to get up off her butt and do somethin' 'bout it." He squeezed my shoulder, his bright green eyes steadily meeting mine. "I think that was really cool of you. If you'd have told me, I'd have helped."
I tried to give him a weak smile, pushing him away. Nice or not, he still smelled like sweat. "Thanks, Jay."
I felt myself crumple under Mom's steady gaze. She was always short – but now she seemed taller than me. I shrunk back a few steps, feeling panic take over. I wanted Natalie here to help me! I was just this helpless stupid seventeen year old and I had no idea on how to face my family! Oh, God, what have I gotten myself in to?
Isaac shook his head from the corner of the room, adjusting his glasses with one hand. "Jordan, you troll, you're not even one year into college yet. I don't care how much you encourage her, Becky did something wrong, and she should face the consequence!" He turned to face me, the hazel eyes behind the glasses a perfect replica of Mom's eyes. Unfortunately, that meant they were just as piercing. "Becky, you're a smart girl. You're almost a senior at high-school now. What were you thinking messing with the mayor's family?" He let out a frustrated sigh.
I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes at him. Isaac was the pompous one, that's what I liked to think. So what if he was fresh out of college and a big shot writer at some scientific magazine. To me it just translated, physics dork, which was a very good title for him. And he could just take that title and shove it up his – I bit my tongue so I wouldn't yell. Instead, I forced my voice into strained calmness. "So what if he's the mayor's son, Isaac? He's a normal human being too." I pictured Mathew behind my lids, his smile, his eyes. Mathew was Mathew – that much was always a given.
Isaac opened his mouth, but Dad held up his hands. "Becky…" he began, but I cut him off.
My legs started to shake now. Why were they being so difficult? Was it really that bad? Did they dislike Mathew all that much? "Dad, did you not like it that he isn't religious?"
Dad's forehead creased. His expression was so surprised I'd have laughed, if it weren't for the situation. He rubbed his head with his hands, the white streaks in his brown hair more noticeable to me now. He sighed before looking up at me. "Of course that didn't bother me – you know I accepted him without any problems."
I swallowed hard, leaning a bit on Jordan's massive side. "Then did you not like how he was treating Natalie?"
Dad actually laughed, a short surprised sound. "He treated her like a queen. Of course that wasn't an issue." He shook his head.
I forced myself to stand taller. From the corner of my eye, I saw Jordan grin – seeing as I used his trick for confidence. "Then I don't understand what's the problem. They were ready. Mathew would have been miserable otherwise, Dad." My voice pleaded him to understand.
Dad sighed again, sitting down on the faded green loveseat. He didn't look at me.
I blinked back tears, turning to Mom. "Mom, did you have any objections? I mean, Mathew is a good guy." I was sure she could see that. Heck, anyone who freakin' looked at him could see that!
Mom bit her fingernails. She looked even tinier and frailer than normal, as if standing so tall before took a lot out of her and now she was sagging. "I know that, sweetie. You know I love Mathew as if he was my own son."
Isaac shook his head again. "Becky, stop confusing them, what you did was immoral and you had absolutely no right–"
I've finally had it. It felt like everything exploded inside of me. My tears started cascading down my cheeks, a sob building in my throat. I whirled at Isaac. "Would you just shut up, you – you moron?! Yeah, okay, you're mad – I understand that part – but can you stop being a jerk for five minutes?! I'm trying to explain!"
Mom gasped. "Becky, language!"
I started crying harder. This was so unfair! Nat shouldn't have left me alone to deal with their wrath – she should have thought of me too! But this job was mine now, and I was going to get it done. I wiped my nose with my sleeve. "No, Mom, I want to finish this!" I shrugged out of Logan's worried arm. My eyes darted all across the room as I blinked harder against the tears. I had to make them understand. I just had to – for Natalie's sake, for Mathew's, even for my sake. "Mathew was going to get married to that –to that – that hag, and he would have been miserable. He didn't love her. He broke up with her – he called off the wedding, but that wretched mom of his called it back on and forced him there! And – and Natalie…" I got too choked up to talk about this one.
I still remembered the sound of her cries all those nights, when she thought I was asleep. That hopeless expression that didn't leave her face all that time still haunted me. It hurt me so much to see her like that. I looked at Mom.
I spoke so softly it was a real miracle that they heard. "Mom, Natalie was hurt so bad. You didn't hear… you didn't see her… when… when…" I couldn't control it anymore. I hurled myself at Mom and hugged her tight. "I'm not a bad girl," I bawled into her shoulder. "I'm not." Mom rested her head on my shoulder. I whispered in her ear, so only she could hear, "I loved him too, you know? So much… but sh-she was just so hurt…"
Mom slowly petted my back. "I know, dear," she said softly back. Then she looked up to meet my father's eyes.
Jordan cleared his throat, bless his big jock heart. "Mom, Dad, you guys eloped. I don't see why Nat and Mathew are any different."
I turned around to look at him. He was still wearing half of that foolish smile, shrugging in his dirty baseball uniform. His cheeks were burned from the sun. I ran back into his arms, feeling the secure cage of his hug. "Thank you, thank you, thank you for understanding!" I cried as I hugged him.
Dad's face was completely red when we both looked up. "They're young!" he bellowed.
"No, they're not – they're twenty – you guys were nineteen," I retorted eagerly right back. "Now would you please accept this has happened and move on?"
Dad sat down wearily on the couch. "Becky, what were you thinking?" he asked, his forehead creasing again. He put his head in his hands, taking deep breaths.
It hurt me deep inside to see him like this. My knuckles tightened and I walked stiffly to sit next to him. "Dad," I said softly, "You preach for love, every single day. I saw love – right before my eyes." I could feel tears racing up my throat once more. And you let it slip away, whispered a mean voice in my head. I continued, ignoring the voice. "Dad, you have to understand me on that one. You know they can be happy now."
I stood up edgily, taking my turn in pacing across the small living room. Everything looked shabby: the faded couches that have been there since Isaac was born, the two pictures on the walls we found in garage sales, the vomit-colored carpet. Everything. We couldn't afford a TV, but that was cool. I had better things to do. Like curling up and dying somewhere – my top priority at the moment.
Mom bit her lower lip, taking a seat next to Dad. "Honey, what do you think?"
Dad took in a big breath. He finally glanced up at me. His cheeks and neck were still red. "Maybe you have a point," he admitted gruffly.
I breathed in relief. Mom understood. Dad got it. Jordan was already on my side.
Isaac made a disgruntled sound, glancing at his hand watch. "I have to go to work." He shot me a firm look. "I still don't agree."
I stared back, folding my arms across my chest. "If you enjoy seeing our sister unhappy, that's your issue. I did all I could for her happiness."
"Something you didn't do, Physics Nerd," Jordan injected. I grinned, since we thought up of the same title.
Isaac grimaced at us, kissed Mom goodbye, and left the house – making sure to slam the door behind him. It didn't matter that he was twenty two years old, he could be such a baby.
Mom furrowed her eyebrows at me. "There's one thing I don't understand, Becky, why did you run inside the church instead of Natalie?"
I remembered the uncomfortable moment of having everyone stare at me and shuddered. "Easy. You know Natalie – she'd have fallen flat on her face if she tried to run. 'Sides, I'm on the track team: I'm fast." I flashed my teeth in a wide smile. Nat was such a klutz.
Jordan punched my shoulder playfully. "Sports are in our blood," he agreed before walking up to the kitchen. I heard our old refrigerator open.
"Well, I did have to hurry," I reasoned, then frowned. "They were sort of short on time."
Mom and Dad switched glances. "Honey," Mom said, taking Dad's hand in hers, "Are you sure this is what you wanted?"
My throat clogged up. Of course this was not what I wanted. What I wanted didn't matter. I didn't dare voice the thought, to myself or to anyone else. I wouldn't own up to it.
So I said what was closest to the truth.
"I don't really know. I'm going to go out for a walk – I'll be back in time for dinner." Before they could say anything I bolted straight towards the door. Outside, I breathed the cool evening air, and let my feet do the working. I ran and ran, not really sure where I was going. All I knew was that I had to get away. Now.
