Poem #2

I am 14 years old
not young
Though others may say different
Youth is a state
a mode of thought
not completely in relation
to the biological wind up mechanism
(Think Cymbal Monkeys)
Halting in blunt realisation
Oh Fuck you don't have
the time looks or talent
To be all you can be
is a goal only attainable
by the the mute mundane shifting
masses (walking un-undead
reminders bustling and
bumping into each other)
But I guess I'm not that
ancient
Hell I still think I can
make it as a poet
Reading Sartre with a
plastic flashlight

Hello there, fellow 14 year old!

I don't think I can find anyone that reads Sartre our age! YAY!!! I'm reading Existentialism is a Humanism, what about you?

And yes, I do think that anyone can make it as a poet just by reading his works --- I love his plays.

Ah, I'm supposed to review this poem, not to talk about one of my favourite authors.

Anyway, I thought it was a deep, meaningful poem. It's short but concise; and I like how you didn't put any punctuation except for the brackets. I agree with all the things you said in this poem, especially the part about un-undead masses. The only "real" people left, so to speak, are children, who can still be unblemished by the complexity of the world of grown-ups. But I'm rambling again.

To put it in a nutshell, I like this poem --- you deserve a gold star!

Keep writing! I'll look forward to your other works!

-Rosie =]

I like! It's simple, yet cunning. It's short, yet it seems to stretch out forever. It's a nice one...not new, but nice! Keep it up!





~Sarah

Great work at 14 years!

Try to use punctuations such as commas and full-stops when writing your poems, this poem is sort of breathless when reading as it has no punctuations. Other than that, I quite enjoyed this poem.

' To be all you can be is a goal only attainable '. - These sentences stood out the most to me. It sounds as if it should be a motto

If you continue the way you're going, I reckon you could be a poet someday!

Keep up the good work